voltavotary

hi

i have a dilema that i think i will just ultimately choose to ignore

you see, i have a boyfriend that ive been with for almost two years.

we own a house. while his name is not on it at all, its still ours.

my dilema is that i still care for this guy... yet, there is someone else who also has my adoration... has for the longest time, since i was about 16. he is so attractive to me, so interesting, intriguing, fun, hilarious, an aries... not that im sure i would ever really want him as a boyfriend, but god how i wish i could flirt with him, touch him, all that stuff. i feel butterflies in my stomach when it comes to him, always have.

we had our chance before to make something work, and it didnt. thats why thats not really what i want from him. and its not to say that i want sex from him either... that might be nice, but thats not even what im talking about. i just want to be around him, but as more than a friend. i feel wrong even talking like this about someone other than my boyfriend.

at this point, i dont want or need to be his someone special, nor his screw partner, just... like i said, more than a friend.

i wonder if that pretty much explains it all. basically, im financially and lovingly obligated to my boyfriend, who constantly pisses me off, yet i care a lot for and absolutely cannot ever stab in the back, and i'd also like to have a way-too-friendly-fun-weirdo relationship of sorts with the guy on whom i have an "eternal crush". i feel like a little fuckin whimpy teenager.




P.S.- i heard a rumor that jennifer aniston is dating vince vaughn Lucky bitch if so.

P.P.S.- no, vince vaughn is not the aforementioned "eternal crush"... duh