visionfromacrash

I want to be able to write again, but it seems all I produce is crap that makes me wonder if I ever could write at all.

You know I just close my eyes, and the world disappears

I feel distant from people I care about. Generally, I'd feel worse about this because it'd make me feel-callous. However, when I watched two good friends blow up at eachother last night, it made me feel it all too close than what I'm used to.

You're welcome as cancer, but my door's always unlocked

Danielle comes down all too soon-next weekend, at the soonest. I'm not sure I feel ready for her, and yet I'm chomping at the bit for it all at once.

Maybe its just because I want to fuck myself up.

As counterproductive as it all is, I must admit that I do. I feel I've deserved every ounce of pain that I've gotten, and work to actually bring it on myself because I feel I deserve more.

C'est bizarre, N'est pas?