visionfromacrash

Well, I've found something new in life, but lost something in order to do so.

Indifference. It was like there was a small switch in my mind that was turned to off. Note its not complete, but the feeling of being zen master to some things is comforting.

The cost?: A friend I've had since Junior year of high school; Scratch that...It was a weird two years between the first and the last. Also someone I had deep feelings for. However, she didn't see a possibility for a future and broke it off. I played a whiny little bitch for a couple hours (and threw some work out the window), and then came to the conclusion that being friends would be hard and awkward. Commence fight #2. It ended with me being challenged to talk to her without "lying" about anything (the work I threw out the window, feelings I had for her, etc.). 24 minutes later? I was calm, collected, and indifferent.

Its an odd feeling because I am used to being emotional about many, many things, and often overemotional. So, it is a new feeling, but I am enjoying it thoroughly.

But shit I'm scared of the Greyhound tomorrow. Wish me luck.