i have hated him again, and it is too bad how you take what you would think would be mine hoping to ignite a fire there, the cold wave of fear to move me towards your action. i am just trying to be clever, it matters, you know. he stopped by the door while i orgasmed and does'nt it figure his movement stops by the...
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mtlqueen:
I love going to that place for pleasure. Lately it's the only place I've been able to get off.
and what was it,
what was it, exactly?
i could not be certain
but i heard the voice
calling my name
a second time
louder.
in these cases, i am a child
still wanting to do my small
and limited
amount of good
to hold still, sit straight
put my head against the head rest
listen to directions
and not complain too much.
i come...
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what was it, exactly?
i could not be certain
but i heard the voice
calling my name
a second time
louder.
in these cases, i am a child
still wanting to do my small
and limited
amount of good
to hold still, sit straight
put my head against the head rest
listen to directions
and not complain too much.
i come...
Read More
mtlqueen:
thanks for posting that, i'm so glad you're here writing away furiously...it makes this place so much more interesting.
bleached my hair in the places it would take. i still battle against the black haircolor that i decided to use about 6 months ago. i want to install some color but alas i do have a job working for a slightly crusty older boss and think i better ask him before i do it. of course, when i was a bit younger, i did'nt...
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vdrak80:
This isn't Cafe Nola, is it?
mtlqueen:
ugh. i know the feeling! i need to take out the one visible piercing i kept (i had quite a selection going, at one time) every time i do something "business-y"...my mother says "you don't want to alienate your potential customers!" i say, nobody even notices it anyway! (it's just a little, tight septum ring...most people think my nose is a little drippy, that's all) i think your hair is going to look fantabulous! don't forget to take a picture when it's all brushed and flushed nice!
it's time for
wine!
wine!
kurtz:
yes, switched from whiskey to wine 5 min ago. a bottle of lindemans coonewara '96. good decision now, bad decision tomorrow AM. write something for me tomorrow...... or just write like you've never written before.....
started watching tlc a makeover story. got depressed. i've been a raging bitch because we have'nt had any heat availible to us. the repair man is a fucking joke. he gets here and all he wants to do is talk. i really don't care about him or his life, just fix the damn heat! it has been four days. so anyway, that is the jist...
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mindless:
Bleach your hair! What do you have to lose? You only live once.
it happened later, and why not? the guilt was overwhelming but he was breaking inside, or had broken. now his skin was like a trashbag, something to transport the garbage in. when it first started happening, it was as if there was a howling of wind some great force, a sign before the death of something, someone, many people.
he said to himself, "i feel...
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he said to himself, "i feel...
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mtlqueen:
you know, it's funny you say the "you and me against the world" thing because i can honestly say i have known it in a relationship, but not really in the same way as with my husband. my first serious boyfriend, we dated for nearly four years i guess, and we definitely had that team spirit thing (we were called "the fuckers" and everyone else was known as "the man"). my husband (mike) and i are two drastically different personalities, strong ones mind you, and we just fight our own battles against the man now. this is so strange, you know i never even looked at is this way before. but hey, whatever works, right? the dude i have a crush on is weasel_tzar. (*shhhh*). it's so freaky because if i had met him a few years earlier, i really don't think i'd be married right now. just the way fate travels, i guess. we're connected at the brain (whatever, i am totally reading too much into what little info he divulges on this website)(i am such a jackass). anyway, since i hardly ever have sexy dreams, i get to day dream about sexy people. you, my friend with the piercing eyeballs and the dreamy brain, are definitely one of those sexy people! so there!
ps- my cat pee wee sends his extra cuddly kitten love your way *purr*
ps- my cat pee wee sends his extra cuddly kitten love your way *purr*
the heat is on / the house is warm i have finally changed the little earring in my ear...now it has some red to it, although not what i intended. i think of it on me somewhere. a small bit of color and it satisfies. i was thinking of forgeting about the whole christmas thing but have been sucked into the idea of going back...
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in the grey room, we are not allowed to sleep. there are bangings on the walls and the floor. the ones that want to sleep go underground. they dig little holes in the basement (dirt floor). and the lights here come on pink at night, but i don't see them dead on. the things in front of me are like a drug induced stupor i...
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mtlqueen:
dear, dear lovely and amazing strega...
you couldn't be more right. it's hard to pick and choose on which levels to be involved in the larger world (don't worry, it's just a mirage anyway). i think i seem to be creating a lot of my own worries lately, actually i KNOW i'm my own worst enemy right now (other than "the man", of course). i like getting lost in your journals though. my friend that i'm opening the studio with is currently working on pieces based on nests, so the end of this journal has many many layers of imagery and meaning for me right now...very powerful, those little nests.
you couldn't be more right. it's hard to pick and choose on which levels to be involved in the larger world (don't worry, it's just a mirage anyway). i think i seem to be creating a lot of my own worries lately, actually i KNOW i'm my own worst enemy right now (other than "the man", of course). i like getting lost in your journals though. my friend that i'm opening the studio with is currently working on pieces based on nests, so the end of this journal has many many layers of imagery and meaning for me right now...very powerful, those little nests.
_william_:
that piece goes really well with portishead in the backround.
what to do with the other 21 hours...
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_william_:
I'm good honey. And you? what are you doing with those hours of yours?
mtlqueen:
yes, you do have an amazing gaze!!! i bet you shoot to kill with those eyeballs of yours (*laser sounds*). i'm kind of frazzled, personally. x-mas is just not happening this year, on a totally consumerist level. i'll still have a couple of nice pot luck dinner parties to go to, but nobody's getting prezzies. (except for a few home made ones, which are my favorite anyway, i just can't do as many as i'd like.) i'm getting worried about all the ins and outs of getting the studio/store up and running this february as well...i've never had so much overhead in my life! (well, except the whole 40 grand for school thing 
)as you can tell by my profile i've been wearing my pissy pants for the last couple of days, letting my ability to create anxiety get the better of me. hope you're doing well, drop me a more detailed line if you have time (the other 21 hours...)
)as you can tell by my profile i've been wearing my pissy pants for the last couple of days, letting my ability to create anxiety get the better of me. hope you're doing well, drop me a more detailed line if you have time (the other 21 hours...)have been avoiding the site. the focus is on creating good food. i have made soup, and tonight, pork fried rice - a big step since i usually don't work with meat. when my partner asked me why i am cooking these days i say because it is important to me. i am also a picky eater and the usual rice and bean combo isn't...
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oh, fuck it.
_william_:
are you having my day?
randomdent:
:|
like her
i thought
what does it really matter?
and
when that loss of care
starts speeding through
it is like
water
through the fingers
floss or
toothpaste
the perfume
behind the ears
gets caked
after you keep putting it on
and don't wash the rest away
like external earwax
only not so bitter
so you may still
go to that frozen lake looking for...
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i thought
what does it really matter?
and
when that loss of care
starts speeding through
it is like
water
through the fingers
floss or
toothpaste
the perfume
behind the ears
gets caked
after you keep putting it on
and don't wash the rest away
like external earwax
only not so bitter
so you may still
go to that frozen lake looking for...
Read More
mtlqueen:
a little melodrama goes a long way, doesn't it? fecund matter, those dramas...you are amazing