Well it's ACT II of that time of year. If you remember the begining of November I was just a little emo bitch about things because of my birthday. Round two is coming in the form of Christmas. I am really to the point where I wish I could just sleep through the weekend and just forget about everything. I am not looking forward to the holiday. So many reasons for it too. I can't for all too be over.
Secondly, I hate Myspace. Granted, yes, I am on everyday and I have met a lot of cool people and stayed knowing them through the site, but with more friends comes more complications. I am so tired of drama in life. I am so tired of us 20 somethings being petty and acting he said she said like we are in middle school. Tired of friends talking behind my back, etc etc. It's all so petty. It makes me always wonder who are my real friends and who aren't.
Lastly, I am fed up with myself. I am out of shape. I am bored with life. I am always broke. I need to get my ass in gear and start working again. UNfortunately there are no good jobs around here worth a fuck. Sorry, I can't work for $7/hr, but I guess I am gonna have to. Sigh. Then after I get all that straightened out, I am gonna get my ass in shape for real. I don't want to be completely out of it come the end of February when rugby season starts all over again. I think just having a job will help that a lot, so at least I'm not just sitting around all day. Maybe I can get that job at the YMCA so I can kill two birds with one stone.
***SIDE NOTE*** Kill one bird with a stone is hard enough. Imagine the serious inprobability of killing two. Makes life seem hopeless at time***
I just need to do something. It's been officially a year since I felt like I was going anywhere and its time for it to stop.
I don't fucking need you, anyone, all I need is myself. And through this depression and bullshit with friends, it makes me think the only person I can seriously count on is myself, and I have been a let down. Come the first of the year, my life starts turning around and then I can start saying fuck you to people again cause you aint got shit on me.
Secondly, I hate Myspace. Granted, yes, I am on everyday and I have met a lot of cool people and stayed knowing them through the site, but with more friends comes more complications. I am so tired of drama in life. I am so tired of us 20 somethings being petty and acting he said she said like we are in middle school. Tired of friends talking behind my back, etc etc. It's all so petty. It makes me always wonder who are my real friends and who aren't.
Lastly, I am fed up with myself. I am out of shape. I am bored with life. I am always broke. I need to get my ass in gear and start working again. UNfortunately there are no good jobs around here worth a fuck. Sorry, I can't work for $7/hr, but I guess I am gonna have to. Sigh. Then after I get all that straightened out, I am gonna get my ass in shape for real. I don't want to be completely out of it come the end of February when rugby season starts all over again. I think just having a job will help that a lot, so at least I'm not just sitting around all day. Maybe I can get that job at the YMCA so I can kill two birds with one stone.
***SIDE NOTE*** Kill one bird with a stone is hard enough. Imagine the serious inprobability of killing two. Makes life seem hopeless at time***
I just need to do something. It's been officially a year since I felt like I was going anywhere and its time for it to stop.
I don't fucking need you, anyone, all I need is myself. And through this depression and bullshit with friends, it makes me think the only person I can seriously count on is myself, and I have been a let down. Come the first of the year, my life starts turning around and then I can start saying fuck you to people again cause you aint got shit on me.
Wanna take this outside ?