vaugelychilly

Generally in work I sell people computers and computer related items. I also then spend eons explaining to people the technical details of these items, how such items interact, how such items can be run, how such things are easy if you just try yourself and quit calling me every six seconds fretting and talking very loudly. Because volume = sincerity. And clearly if you don't deafen my ear, then I will
decide you're unworthy of my help and leave you cowering in the cave of quakeing technophobia.
I also do exactly that with all my co-workers. Technical question? Clearly they just tot over to me, have the customer explain their query, then have me answer it in detail. Then toddle back off to wherever and take the sale. I order and manage stock. I manage the staff on the floor, authorise returns, schedule breaks and resolve disputes.

In addition I generally get lumbered with fixing wayward PC's, laptops, iPods, phones, network devices, screens, GPS systems, car kits, cameras, expansion cards, house phones, software issues, printers, printer cables, scanners, games, xboxs, psps, projectors, tills, reciept printers, wireless cards, radios, mp3 players, speaker systems, security cameras, canvas prints, mountings, label machines and shelving.

So today I added a new one to the list. We were supposed to be given Microsoft Windows Vista training. What actually occured was some swarthy rep arrived. He has about as much technical knowledge as a bag of decomposing dingos kidneys who've flunked out of playschool.
Freely admitted so and then proceeded to ask me how to operate and run Vista and several new features in it.
And I knew how. So I did.
So I trained the Microsoft trainer in Vista.
And my boss stole the complmentary hoodie he brought. I got a sheet saying "Introducing Windows Vista: The Wow Starts Now".
How great.

I looked at this guy. Expensive suit. Very expensive watch. New company car. New laptop. Expense account.
Thick as an inbred badger on dope.
I looked at myself. Enforced company uniform, nasty cheap polyester slacks(which I had to buy myself), acrylic/cotton blend store labeled blue shirt, enforced nasty acrylic tie (emblazoned with the same damn logo as the shirt), shoes that look hideous and a disgruntled demeanour.

Funny thing is I could never get a job with them. They turned me down as I didn't have a first in my degree.
I didn't learn anything I know right now in my degree course. It was the biggest waste of time I've experienced. Yet it's a piece of paper I guess.

Here's me explaining to this technical trainer exactly why his presentation didn't copy to the CD he burned (because he only copied the shortcut to the fucking presentation, not the file itself). Then how to transfer a file to a USB key connected to his laptop. Then how to activate the new Aero feature in Vista that let's you browse your open windows in this ethereal three dimensional stack of utter pointlessness (using so much graphical resources that it makes your card plead for mercy) and how to select his presentation.
Then how to start it.

*sigh*


What the fuck am I doing exactly?