trillian

I have been plagued with insomnia since I was a little kid (might be why I can work on a graveyard schedule so easily) so I would make up stories to tell myself to help me fall asleep. It opened an entire new world for me and my imagination grew larger and larger which was a good thing and a bad thing. Bad thing because I would confuse fantasy and reality sometimes.

I have gotten ahold of my imagination now and I still write...kind of. I was here at work tonight and I realized I have not written anything in quite a long time. I have a work in progress which is taking an incredibly long time and the last couple times I tried to write everything that came out onto the screen seemed like such shit to me. I am way too much of a perfectionist to just go back and correct it later, it needs to be good to my standards now. I have learned two things. One, I really need to get over this perfectionist thing. Two, I believe one of the main reasons I have not written anything in such a long time is because I am scared that everything will turn into shit, back to the perfectionist thing.

I think I need to lock myself in my room for a couple hours today and just write.