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tina

Berkeley

SG Since 2003

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Monday Sep 19, 2005

Sep 19, 2005
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Gauge is coming by today to pick up the rest of her stuff. She doesn't want me to be around. She doesn't event want to see me until after I get back from Europe which will be over a month of us being away from one another. I seriously feel so nauseated and like my eyes just won't stop crying. My throat is knotted and I feel like a schmuck. I feel like a schmuck for feeling this way for not feeling strong and in control when that is who I am. I am in control. I'm on top of the world and have everything going for me right now and yet this beautiful young woman can turn me into a blubering fool. I think she has a lot of hurt and anger going on in her right now and I respect that she is trying to be mature by avoiding conflict as I can't bare to fight with her any more. But it is going to kill me not seeing her on my birthday. Everyone is invited to celebrate my birthday tomorrow. I need as much support as I can possibly get. Everyone is meeting up at Axum Cafe (Haight and Steiner) at 7pm and then headed over to Noc Noc for drinks. Hope to see you all there. I'll try to be socialable and not to horribly depressing.
VIEW 25 of 52 COMMENTS
elizagirl:
1) my mum's birthday is the same as yours--happy belated! I'm sorry it sounds like you are having a hard time.

2) Your new set is both gorgeous and scary--kudos

3) you have red hair, a right monroe and a left nostril piercing--I have red hair, a left monroe and a right nostril piercing. OMG WE'RE TOTALLY BACKWARD TWINS OMG.

Anyway....I hope things pick up for you. And thanks for sharing your lovely set--you're beautiful.
Sep 21, 2005
tulipbooty:
love is difficult

i wish you the best, it must be especially painful to be working to make everyone's lives better
at the expense of your own happiness

hopefully, this is one of a series of bumps, and you will both be stronger for it, together and individually

sometimes love works that way too

good luck
Sep 22, 2005

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