timmytoe

It's not so much that I hate my life, I just hate that everything I love is just out of my reach. I try to reach further, and it skitters away, seemingly out of fear. How do I terrify it so? Perhaps my grasp is stifling, and isn't soft enough to be called love, but is more of a possessive grip, a fear of loosing something that takes over my motor functions. It makes me feel like a big ogre that loves to pet soft things but ends up always breaking their necks... Like Lenny from of mice and men. Only my grip isn't actually physical, it's mental, and only in my mind. I'll have to practice loosening my grip, and letting the things I love flutter about like pixies, art, girls, success, self control can go a long way, and who knows, it may be the way to gain some control over the rest of my life.