Grrrr, Argggg,
This is a hopelessly depressing and serious entry, so move on if you feel like gettin' cheered up or hearing something positive.
I've been thinking about suicide alot again. This isn't a suicide note, and no one's gonna be reading my obituary anytime soon; I ain't that far gone. However, I have a depressive personality at the best of times, so when I get down, I can't help myself from thinking about punching my own ticket. I wish this shit didn't roll around in my head, but it does, and thus far, therapy and drugs have done absolutely FUCK ALL.
I need to find my fire again. I was never all that positive or happy (my mother has actually been on a suicide watch for me for years; it's why she was unimpressed when I moved out), but I at least cared about stuff and people, but now I don't have shit. I guess I'm looking for a reason not to die.
Sorry if you read that, I just need to get it out, and no one ever listens to me. Maybe this'll help my mind move on. And then they wonder why I have no faith in people. Fuck. Just fuck.
Well anyway, burn bright,
J.R.
P.S. I guess this entry ain't gonna make me any friends! And......
THE RATS!!!!
This is a hopelessly depressing and serious entry, so move on if you feel like gettin' cheered up or hearing something positive.
I've been thinking about suicide alot again. This isn't a suicide note, and no one's gonna be reading my obituary anytime soon; I ain't that far gone. However, I have a depressive personality at the best of times, so when I get down, I can't help myself from thinking about punching my own ticket. I wish this shit didn't roll around in my head, but it does, and thus far, therapy and drugs have done absolutely FUCK ALL.
I need to find my fire again. I was never all that positive or happy (my mother has actually been on a suicide watch for me for years; it's why she was unimpressed when I moved out), but I at least cared about stuff and people, but now I don't have shit. I guess I'm looking for a reason not to die.
Sorry if you read that, I just need to get it out, and no one ever listens to me. Maybe this'll help my mind move on. And then they wonder why I have no faith in people. Fuck. Just fuck.
Well anyway, burn bright,
J.R.
P.S. I guess this entry ain't gonna make me any friends! And......
THE RATS!!!!
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
I know that the bugs are always going to be here. I don't actually have a problem with them, after all, without them the world would be nothing...I just don't like that they're so close to my bed.