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thevulture

Canada

Member Since 2004

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Wednesday Oct 06, 2004

Oct 6, 2004
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Finally, the antonym for misogyny is misandry. I've been looking for that word for a while. I like everybody and I hope I've never acted in a way to manifest any general hatred for women or men.

What's interesting today is the paradigm shift from a male dominant society to a strongly female influenced one. Now, I've always seen myself as a defender of female rights and respect for women. But when I bring this up it does seem to hit sensitive nerves. How about a little context.

I'm the eldest in a family of 5. 4 boys and a girl. I was raised by my mother, while my father was bringing home the bacon. My mother wore the pants you could say and was relatively strict, very religious and she also despised men. According to her, and that's what I was thought to believe, only men benefit from sexual intercourse and all men care only for themselves. Talk of sex, drugs and life was very open in my family and I got way too many details about my parents unhealthy intimate relationship. Aside from that, I never saw my mother make any effort to please my dad or to give him any affection. According to her, whenever she attempted to hold my father's hand in public he would shy away afraid of what people might say for public display of affection, so she totally gave it up. My parents were virgins when they married and reliable sources tell me they never cheated on each other. (It's also highly unlikely given we only had one car that stayed at home whenever possible 3kms from the closest village of pop. 1100). In 2000 my mother dumped my dad claiming to not love him anymore. After 2 years and many tears he started dating again until 2004, my mom, who hadn't been dating, asked him to dump his girlfriend to give themselves a second try, which he did.

So in the end I was raised in a very conservative and traditionnal manner with the only significant difference being that my mother wasn't at my dad service in any way.

Until I got dumped by my first love I was virtually incapable of enjoying sex without feeling guilty of using my partner. Interesting isn't it ? Rather pathetic In my mind.

One of the results of all this was my clear fear of women. They seemed to always think I intended to hurt them or use them while all I wanted was the love and affection I lacked growing up. Call me weak, call me emo, whatever.

The funny thing in all of this is that after the big sploush! I had more luck with women (even the intelligent, independant and liberated) when I imitated the assholes, i.e. when I acted like "real/all" men are "supposed" to act.

Anyway I guess it's a bit of a sidetrack but I apparently had to get it out.

Maybe it's just a pathetic rant and then again maybe there is a lack of understanding about misogyny and the general misandry response from many women.

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