This is a story that I encountered and thought you all might enjoy it.
Young men encounter many obstacles when trying to bed teenage girls, but this episode was out of the ordinary. I had a girlfriend at my house while my parents were out, and I put in three solid hours of smooth seduction while we watched Hot Shots! and its sequel, Hot Shots!...
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Young men encounter many obstacles when trying to bed teenage girls, but this episode was out of the ordinary. I had a girlfriend at my house while my parents were out, and I put in three solid hours of smooth seduction while we watched Hot Shots! and its sequel, Hot Shots!...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
vlo:
thanks babe 
noctem:
Hehe... 
Yeah, it was fun, but I'm pretty damn lethargic today. Have fun on your break. I wish I had a huge break to play video games all the time. 
Oh well, late....
Hehe... Yeah, it was fun, but I'm pretty damn lethargic today. Have fun on your break. I wish I had a huge break to play video games all the time. Oh well, late....A preacher wanted to raise money for his church and, on being told that there was a fortune in horse
racing, decided to purchase a horse and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction, the going
price for horses was so high that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since he had it, he might just as well...
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racing, decided to purchase a horse and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction, the going
price for horses was so high that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since he had it, he might just as well...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
noctem:
Oh, they can't give him the chair. A cop already gave him a shotgun blast to the face. The gunman was killed at the scene.
noctem:
Agreed....
From the State where drink driving is considered a sport, comes a true story from the Sunshine Coast, Queensland.
Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighbourhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the car park for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing....
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Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighbourhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the car park for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing....
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VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
foolycooly:
On ya for the A matey, keep up the good shit.
I miss school big time to. Sorry I've been outta touch but duty calls.
Have a great one, and well done on getting ya missus on the site.
Later
I miss school big time to. Sorry I've been outta touch but duty calls.
Have a great one, and well done on getting ya missus on the site.
Later
ash:
uh yes ... i was in florida having a nice drama vacation while school sign ups were going on, so i missed out this semester
WHAT HALLMARK DOESN'T PRINT
1) So your daughter's a hooker, and it spoiled your day. Look at the bright side, it's really good pay.
2) My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat. When I looked at the tire... I noticed your cat. Sorry!
3) Heard your wife left you, How upset you must be. But don't fret about it... She moved in with...
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1) So your daughter's a hooker, and it spoiled your day. Look at the bright side, it's really good pay.
2) My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat. When I looked at the tire... I noticed your cat. Sorry!
3) Heard your wife left you, How upset you must be. But don't fret about it... She moved in with...
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
noctem:
Yeah, it was fun, but I'm not really into violence man. I don't know, I just can't understand why people can't be civilized enough to take some kind of alternate action to resolve a dispute. But one thing I do believe in is karma. Shit always comes back for you. There's no escaping it. But for the most part it was a fun night. At least a memorable one. Late....
Late....
annamei:
sorry to hear about your graveyard folks, i hope they had a legitamite excuse and weren't just making your life hard for the hell of it. hope everything looks better for you soon 
There was a man who really took care of his body. He lifted weights and jogged 8 miles a day. One day, he took a look in the mirror and noticed that he was tanned all over except his "thingie." So he decided to do something about it.
He went to the beach, completely undressed himself and buried himself in the sand, except for his...
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He went to the beach, completely undressed himself and buried himself in the sand, except for his...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
andromeda:
The sugar pick up line.... Too cute. I love that. Ok so those are some of the funniest damn jokes I've heard in awhile. Tell me more!!!!
andromeda:
I have a friend in Phoenix. How far are you from there? I was thinking about visting sometime this winter. Maybe March?
This was submitted to me:
What my mother taught me... yep, I remember these well.
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."
My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .
"If you...
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What my mother taught me... yep, I remember these well.
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."
My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .
"If you...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
noctem:
Kick ass! Maybe we'll finally get to play a game together! 
That's cool though man. Everybody needs to relax sometime. Late....
That's cool though man. Everybody needs to relax sometime. Late....
snowballinhell:
thank you 
I'll do my best not to freeze 'em off completely, I rather like 'em myself I've become somewhat attached to them over the years (obviously!!!!! )
Smooches
Michelle xx
thank you I'll do my best not to freeze 'em off completely, I rather like 'em myself I've become somewhat attached to them over the years (obviously!!!!! )
Smooches
Michelle xx
The Seven Dwarfs went to the Vatican, and got ushered in to see the Pope. Dopey led the pack. "Dopey, my son," said the Pope, "what can I do for you?" Dopey asked, "Excuse me, Your Eminence, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome?" The Pope wrinkled his brow at the odd question, thought for a moment and answered, "No Dopey, there are no...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
vlo:
Inwill never meet the right guy... 
vlo:
i am alll about me at the moment....mr right now can go take a flying leap...my comp has stayed on i am impressed
A beautiful, well endowed, young lady went to her local pet store in search of an exotic pet. As she looked about the store, she noticed a box full of frogs. The sign said: "Sex Frogs! Only $20 each!
Money Back Guarantee! Comes with complete instructions."
The girl excitedly looked around to see if anybody was watching her and whispered softly to the man behind...
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Money Back Guarantee! Comes with complete instructions."
The girl excitedly looked around to see if anybody was watching her and whispered softly to the man behind...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
mistersatan:
You're being a true nerd.
annamei:
ha, black friday! so freakin true.
it wasn't too terrible this year.
it wasn't too terrible this year.
Things I can only say this week at Thanksgiving and get away with it:
1. Talk about a huge breast.
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. It's cool whip time.
4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
5. Whew, that's one terrific spread!
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds...
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1. Talk about a huge breast.
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. It's cool whip time.
4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
5. Whew, that's one terrific spread!
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
noctem:
Yeah, she's on live more than I am actually, since she doesn't work as much as I do. But she's getting pretty good at Halo. She's gotta keep up with the boys Late...
Late...
snowballinhell:
Thanks sweetie That was a good one
Smooches
Michelle xx
That was a good one
Smooches
Michelle xx
Two couples were playing poker one evening. John accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Bill's wife Sue wasn't wearing any underwear under her dress!
Shocked by this, John upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced. Later, John went to the kitchen to...
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Shocked by this, John upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced. Later, John went to the kitchen to...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
noctem:
I think that was one of my favorite jokes so far man. And yeah, Halo2 is becoming the new digital crack, isn't it? I haven't been able to get hardly anything done since it came out. Have yet to see you on there, but I'm sure we'll cross paths soon enough. Late....
And yeah, Halo2 is becoming the new digital crack, isn't it? I haven't been able to get hardly anything done since it came out. Have yet to see you on there, but I'm sure we'll cross paths soon enough. Late....
ash:
HAHAHAHAHAH THATS A RIOT!!!!
I love to laugh, thanks for that!
and I know what u mean abt games ... dude, Ive been playing FABLE for xbox for the last few weeks, nonstop!
I love to laugh, thanks for that!
and I know what u mean abt games ... dude, Ive been playing FABLE for xbox for the last few weeks, nonstop!
A man left work one Friday afternoon. Being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spent his entire paycheck.
When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.
Finally, his wife stopped the nagging and simply...
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When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.
Finally, his wife stopped the nagging and simply...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
vlo:
ok i will do hump someone day for u in the morning
vlo:
no did not sound gay....
Female Prayer:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong,
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages...
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Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong,
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
annamei:
michaels rocks my world
rhyn:
Hey I took you out lastnight and your talking about being depressed...I think I showed you a good time.
You hurt my feelings...I no like you no more Bissh!!!
Admit it, you had a blast lastnight. Or maybe your just a good actor...Nope, you had a good time!!
You hurt my feelings...I no like you no more Bissh!!!
Admit it, you had a blast lastnight. Or maybe your just a good actor...Nope, you had a good time!!