And today started out so well...
My father has alzheimer's. He's in the starting stages so it's painful and frustrating because he knows something's wrong but is refusing to accept that it's what we've determined (with the help of three doctors) it to be. We assure him that there's something amiss but he, being my father, assumes we're out to get him... he wasn't always the nicest guy, sure... but I don't think I'd go so far as to enlist three doctors, a nurse, an social worker and my family in a very eloborate "gotcha!"
Well, maybe I would... but not for this.
So one of the constant challenges we have to face is over the car. He just got a new one and was quickly told he wasn't allowed to drive it. So, it's been in my care ever since. I'm used to playing the role of cabbie for my family... nothing new there... but I've never been in a place where I have to drive my father because he CAN'T. And I know it's no fun for him either, to watch his brand new toy drive away in the hands of someone else...
And today, he wasn't standing for that.
So he quietly said he'd like to borrow the car this week. I countered with he's not allowed to drive. He became furious in an instant and said that it was his and if his licence wasn't officially revoked he was allowed to drive. That I shouldn't be so selfish and unfair to him. And that I should respect him more because he's my father and that while he has said I'm his most caring son, I wasn't proving that by hording the car.
Ouch.
So, now a courtesy... an attempt to not have to make things impersonal and hard through legal/medical injunctions has turned around and bitten me in the ass. And Monday morning, I have to call his nurse and get the paperwork done so that his license is revoked. And I feel like the bad son all of a sudden.
And it breaks my heart... cause it's not fair. Not even a little.
My father has alzheimer's. He's in the starting stages so it's painful and frustrating because he knows something's wrong but is refusing to accept that it's what we've determined (with the help of three doctors) it to be. We assure him that there's something amiss but he, being my father, assumes we're out to get him... he wasn't always the nicest guy, sure... but I don't think I'd go so far as to enlist three doctors, a nurse, an social worker and my family in a very eloborate "gotcha!"
Well, maybe I would... but not for this.
So one of the constant challenges we have to face is over the car. He just got a new one and was quickly told he wasn't allowed to drive it. So, it's been in my care ever since. I'm used to playing the role of cabbie for my family... nothing new there... but I've never been in a place where I have to drive my father because he CAN'T. And I know it's no fun for him either, to watch his brand new toy drive away in the hands of someone else...
And today, he wasn't standing for that.
So he quietly said he'd like to borrow the car this week. I countered with he's not allowed to drive. He became furious in an instant and said that it was his and if his licence wasn't officially revoked he was allowed to drive. That I shouldn't be so selfish and unfair to him. And that I should respect him more because he's my father and that while he has said I'm his most caring son, I wasn't proving that by hording the car.
Ouch.
So, now a courtesy... an attempt to not have to make things impersonal and hard through legal/medical injunctions has turned around and bitten me in the ass. And Monday morning, I have to call his nurse and get the paperwork done so that his license is revoked. And I feel like the bad son all of a sudden.
And it breaks my heart... cause it's not fair. Not even a little.