tehnacho

He and I have known each other for as long as Ben and I have. Actually, they're from the same group of friends.

When Ben and I broke up, last October, I leaned on John, for support...we wound up dating, for a bit, while he was home in December...but he's a tanker in the army....and is living in Germany.

Being monogamous in a long distance relationship, is not difficult for me. It was the whole...he's in a super dangerous profession...that got to me.

Anyhoo, we broke up, I got back together with Ben, and for the most part, I'd forgotten about John.

And then he came back home. I'll tell you....I was never unfaithful to Ben, but all the feelings I had for John, just came right back like a flash flood. It was so hard.

We had an hour long conversation the day before he left....He cried, I cried....it was actually pretty pathetic, looking back at it. He loves me so much. I saw that on Wednesday night. I realized that I still love him too...but our lives are going in two opposite directions....there really is no future between us. I think that makes the saddest.