tds

I see myself on T.V., I'm a faker, a paper clown
It's clear to all my friends that I habitually lie; I just bring them down
I claim proneness to exaggeration
But the truth lies in my frustration
The children of the night, they all pass me by
Have to drench myself in brandy
In sleep I'll hide
But however much I booze
There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out
I don't care what you say, boy
There ain't no way out

I lose so many nights of sleep worrying about my responsibilities
Are the problems that screw me up really down to him or me
My ego will just confuse me
Some day it's going to up and use me
Dish me out another tailor-made compliment
Tell me about some destiny I can't prevent
And however much I squirm
There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out
I don't care what you say, boy
There ain't no way out

Won't somebody tell me how to get out of this place?!

Then the night comes down like a cell door closing
Suddenly I realize that I'm right now, I'm on the scene
While sitting here all alone with a bottle and my head a-floating
Far away from the phone and the conscience going on at me
And on at me, and I don't care what you say
There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out

Now the walls are all clawed and scratched
Like by some soul insane
In the morning I hungoverly detach myself
I take no blame
I just can't face my failure
I'm nothing but a well fucked sailor
You at home can easily decide what's right
By glancing very briefly at the songs I write
But it don't help me that you know
This ain't no way out
Won't somebody tell me?
I don't care what you say, boy
There ain't no way out

There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out

Give me the key, lock it away

There ain't
There ain't
There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out
There ain't no way out "However Much I Booze"-The Who



Okay, because i'm currently debating meanings of life & philisophical differences of songwriters i will sadly never meet, i've made a decision that i feel is worth committing to in print: TDS can no longer be allowed to drink whiskey straight, no matter how much i bitch or whatever. Call it quitting while i'm behind. And truthfully, i only drink the shit because i still have a little ass backwards obsession with being a John Wayne/Lee Marvin/'68-'82 Clint Eastwood badass & drinking things at a level that no one in reality can possibly do. Of all the things i still carry from being fucking five years old, had to be that. So yeah, no more. Only exception is the odd carbomb, i think. And i stress odd.

Oh & I'm taking a month off from drinking anything more than a beer or two. I feel this makes sense on many levels, & honestly i just can't keep acting my age at the current levels. Makes me feel like shit for a ton of reasons. Getting drunk isn't the problem so much as BEING drunk, then comes the whole not being drunk which is just horrible. Not meaning to sound preachy or anything, so don't think i am. I still greatly enjoy the Cabin, mainly for the company.

That song above gets more relevent to me as time marches on, by the way. Damndest thing.

So yeah, since i feel miserable, this thing is done.