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takeshi21

Member Since 2002

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Wednesday Apr 06, 2005

Apr 6, 2005
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As many of you may (or may not) know, I am in the midst of transition. I am moving this weekend, so my evenings have been ostensibly filled with the joys of packing my belongings in preparation for my New Life. But I seem to keep getting fucking sidetracked.

Inspired by many a fine journal and blog, I began searching for a letter I wanted to quote that was sent to me about seven years ago by my friend Morgan. She was reflecting on pain and suffering and its purpose as a lens to focus for us the meaningfulness of our sorrow. Or, as my new friend CKLAROCK quoted Joseph Campbell, People all say that what were seeking is meaning for life. I dont think thats what were really seeking. I think that what were seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonances within our own innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive.

Bingo.

I never did find that damn letter but I what I did discover was a veritable treasure trove of thoughts and memories that Ive collected over the years. I stumbled across several hundred, if not thousands, of pages of letters and notes and memos from people Ive known and loved, as well as many of my own ramblings, most of which Id completely forgotten. I dont think Id ever considered just how valuable this cache would become, but man, its a helluva find.

With the money Ill be getting after my move, I think Im going to buy a nice scanner and begin posting the details of these past loves and dilemmas and hates and encouragements. Im thrilled to be in possession of the original prose, but shit, its only worth something if I can share. I have easily over twelve years of correspondence which, once I move, will become a part of the public domain. Kinda cool. Heh.

So, sorry my exes. Our heart wrenching tales will be given up for public consumption whether or not you like it! And thats what you get for entrusting me with the original manuscripts. Muhahahahaha

But, in all seriousness, these recollections help me to contextualize my current situation. And Im gonna need it because if this note from E. is any indication of whats to come, Im about to get cold-cocked: I'd like your new address so I can finish my letter and send it to you. Thats whats coming to you when you break a girls heart after five years.

PS: Anybody else notice how much less quickly toilet paper disappears when there are no girls around?
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
cklarock:
Dude! We should build a website for your letter archive!

Also, here is my favorite all-time quote on pain, given to me by the dangerous guy who can go invisible:

"Pain is just an emotion."
Apr 8, 2005
bob_dobalina:
i have a box of letters that i've collected over the years. its amazing how much good stuff you can forget if the bad ending is what's freshest in your memory.
Apr 10, 2005

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