takeshi21

My life seems to becoming more and more like that of Lester Burnham. In case you've forgotten, Lester is the dysfunctionally functional character that Kevin Spacey plays in "American Beauty."

I'm under constant pressure to conform and mold myself into my boss' image, to become what he is, to attain his "success." There are a series of industry award ceremonies coming up that I've been asked to attend, although they're not particularly interesting and I'd expressed some of these thoughts. And this is what my boss emailed me over the weekend, in response:

"In the future, I think a more appropriate resonse would have been, "thank you for going to bat for me and getting me a ticket for the ceremony, I know it is very expensive and I am so excited to go. I also am really excited about going to the other events, it will be a great opportunity to interact with the community.

"You will not succeed, if you are not willing to go
'24-7' and make it your 'life'. Trust me, I know."

But I refuse to submit. I refuse to make, what is essentially a sales job into the meaning of my entire existence. I'm under pressure to keep going because Erin is still unemployed. But it's simply not within me to follow the lead of somebody so obsessed with such immaterial and foolish things as money and success.

For this, my life had become hell.

Word of the day: purgatory (n.) - 1 : an intermediate state after death for expiatory purification; specifically : a place or state of punishment wherein according to Roman Catholic doctrine the souls of those who die in God's grace may make satisfaction for past sins and so become fit for heaven. 2 : a place or state of temporary suffering or misery