tadzi

another entry from the Jason Is an Asshole series.

i told this story to a friend of mine who told me that i had never shared this with her before. this surprised me because i thought i had told her pretty much every story i had by this point. so since it was new to her, i figured id share it here as well.

so several years ago, i worked at Macy's in loss prevention (which is just a fancy term for security). i didnt spend a lot of time watching cameras because of the hours i worked there. the store opened at 10 AM, but i had to get there at 4 AM and let receiving in. so for 6 of any 8 hours i was working there, i was just sitting on my ass. needless to say, i would get REALLY bored.

so, like i said, it was security in a department store. because of that we had a polaroid camera to take pictures of the people who were apprehended while shoplifting.

i can sense some of you already know where this is going.

boredom causes me to do peculiar things. sometimes disturbing things. like using the polaroid camera to take multiple pictures of my penis, then write sinnister messages on them like, 'I'm watching you...' and leaving them on some random dudes windshield in the parking lot.

i never said i was perfect.