tadzi

10. no cigarettes....
9. and no THC make jason something something...
8. no privacy.
7. unemployment is fucking with me.
6. i miss Pia.

5. i miss the closer proximity of my friends.
4. the job hunting still fucking sucks.
3. im fucking BORED.
2. im broke.
1. im 31 and im living at home. i feel like a fucking loser.

9. food. there is some.
8. no goddamn ice cream truck hanging out outside my window for 45 fucking minutes.
7. nobody going through my garbage.
6. no goddamn parasites eating my arms and neck while im asleep.
5. i can take a bath as opposed to a shower if i so please since theres no hole in the bathtub.
4. if i drive to buy something, i have a significantly lower chance of having an aneurysm since theres a lot less stupid fucks driving down here.
3. cable.
2. central air.
1. nobody taking my laundry out of the drier and throwing it in the floor.

8. Sex in the City
7. Chicago
6. Dirty Dancing
5. I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry
4. Step Up
3. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past
2. any of those fucking "___________ Movie" movies.
1. Mama Mia

7. Personal Massage Therapist for Kate Winslet.
6. Writer for High Times.
5. Stunt Cock.
4. Test Subject for studes on sleeping patterns.
3. Television Writer. Degree in Broadcasting or no...i can come up with better shit than a lot of whats out there.
2. Pot Connoisseur.
1. Supervillain.

6. Rob and Arnie of the Rob, Arnie, and Dawn Show. if you dont know what im talking about, theres a thread for it here.
5. Carlos Mencia. hes not funny. why does he still have a show? and why do people compare him to dave chappelle? because they both arent caucasian? heres the difference... chappelle did racial humor...mencia does racist humor. theres a world of difference between pointing out the absurdity of racism and celebrating racism. you suck, mencia!
4. Jennifer Lopez. dont ask me why...she just irks me. every time i see her i get this urge to kick the television.
3. Ben Affleck. of course trying to hit him with a cricket bat would prove futile as getting too close to his head would just cause the bat to be pulled from your fingers before it entered into geostationary orbit around his massive head.
2. Steven Spielberg and George Lucas. yes, we are doing these together, so technically its 7 people. were going to do it for indiana jones. and for yoda. and chewie. and ET. these cocksuckers must PAY!
1. Kid Rock....yes, i know we havent heard from him in a while, but i heard that hes planning on releasing a new album. FUCK THAT. im not going to let it happen.

5. Justin Kirk

best known for playing Andy on Weeds. the fact that his character is fucking awesome makes him even cooler.
4. Jeffrey Dean Morgan

also appeared, albeit briefly, in Weeds as Nancy's dead husband, but of course most famously as the sociopathic Comedian in Watchmen.
3. Denzel Washington

i read some thing once...dunno if its true. could be one of those urban legends. but apparently, his face is perfecly symmetrical and anyone who knows shit about anatomy knows thats really fucking rare. in any case, hes a good looking dude.
2. Clive Owen

ive mentioned my boy crush on him before. seriously though, hes a handsome motherfucker and a damn good actor.
1. Michael C. Hall

i mean cmon.

4. A Dirty Shame I LOVE John Waters movies. theyre so absurdly wonderful.
3. But I'm a Cheerleader somehow i managed to miss this one before, but it was cute. plus it had Natasha Lyonne before she went batshit and Clea Duvall whom i absolutely adore.
2. Terminator Salvation i enjoyed it. robots shooting shit and christian bale. so long as you dont go out of your way to make it suck, its pretty hard to fuck up. a couple of nice homages to its predecessors.
1. Star Trek again, i enjoyed it. for the most part. i thought Eric Bana was kind of weak, but the main cast was pretty good all around. particularly Zachary Quinto as Spock and Simon Pegg as Scotty.

3. FireBrand. my hetero-life mate. with me being down here now, it kinda makes hanging out a bit more difficult. nobodys fault. miss you, dude.
2. Morgan. i was thinking of you the other day. i miss coming down to visit you in maryland. twas always fun. even though we never got to roll together.
1. soiraile. this particular list wouldnt be complete without you. it would be really awesome if we could see each other more than twice a year (incidentally im not blaming you for this). the good news is it makes seeing you that much cooler when we do.

2. a goddamn cigarette.
1. a fucking bowl.

1. go the fuck to sleep.