Oh my go it's nearly Christmas! This year has just flown by me!
I'd like to say this year has been full of achievements but it really hasn't. It has been a stressful one on many levels. Work has been crappy in the second half of the year, far to stressful and it's a stressful job in itself. I really hope the situation improves and soon as I think some of us are at breaking point. Maybe a break over Christmas will do everyone some good and the new year brings about positive changes.
Personally it's been up and down. A year ago my ex finally accepted separation, however he still doesn't quite get it really. I think it's all too difficult for him. I have been doing things for myself this year (wow). I've lost a lot of weight, I've traveled a bit and tried to enjoy myself. I've not really been seeing anyone but do have a very close friend but eh it's complicated. Too long distance to be serious I think but we will see. I'm not rushing anything. I think most guys would struggle with my busy schedule so maybe long distance is better haha. I do like some independence but I do get depressingly lonely at times. I really crave cuddles and human contact at times. I haven't had a real cuddle since August! How pathetic is that?! Oh well I well get my cuddles soon :):):) <3
My health has been up and down too :( although I seem to have a better handle and control over my chronic back pain, it's still not gone. I really hate being on all these drugs. I can't wait to be in a position where I can stop taking them. My immune system has been a bit shitty. I think it's my diet. I'm conscious I'm not getting all the things I need. It might be stress as well but hey in the long run I needed to get the weight off. A year of sniffles is nothing. I also need surgery on my wrist :/ I have a ganglion cyst which is really hurting. So we will see how long that takes!
I really hope that this is a good Christmas. I just want to spend it with friends and enjoy myself. The past few Christmases have been really rough and downright depressing! I couldn't care less for the material. I just want happiness and not to feel alone as I have for the past few years. Transient as it may be, I'd just like to be happy even for a short period.
Sorry this wasn't a cheery blog but sometime life's not like that. No matter how optimistic I am, unfortunately reality bites. I might have to bite it back for being a total bitch :D :p
Xxx
