Well poop! It's been forever and a day since I updated last... and man, has stuff changed here...
First, my girl's moved out. = Well, kinda.
Thing is that she went back to her mom's place three states away to pick up two kittens they had there, and was going to stay a few weeks so I could get the money situation here straightened out a bit... but she got a job offer as a teacher's assistant for the coming school year while she was back. It pays decently and if she takes it, then she won't have to pay to send her son to school next year either.
Didn't help that when she first told me about it, I completely took it wrong, thought she'd already accepted it and was telling me "Suprise! Not coming back! haha!" ... yeah, that was a great night... don't think I was sober much, but I don't really remember
Still, I'm thinking that it's probably best if she stays there for the coming school year because of a few things... the obvious one is money... neither one of us was really ready to move in together, at least financially anyway. I can get back on my feet, buy up the stuff I've been saving for, etc. Second, I transfer to a new command early next year, so if she keeps her son in school there, by the time he's out of school, I'll have transferred... so he gets a full school year uninterrupted if he stays there.
Another thing is that I'm not sure if I'm ready to settle down... I love the hell outta her, but for some reason I can't keep my eyes in my head, which bugs me to no end. There's more too it, but it's fairly personal (that, and this entry is long enough!)
She already hinted at taking it as a "temporary separation" so we could see other people while we're apart... but I've got issues with that too.. .I mean, what about whoever I'm seeing? I dunno, maybe I'm too old fashioned or too damned sensitive, or just stupid or something. *shrug* I suppose I'd have to make it crystal clear WTF is up if I find someone here. Then again, I doubt I'll find anyone really understanding when they see the apartment, after all, 1/2 the stuff here is her funiture and decoration... *shrug* hehe. Oh well.
Not even gonna get started on work. Lots of dumb stuff going on there. Makes me sad. Anywhoot, more updates later! How much later, I dunno
EDIT: hahah, 5 minutes later and *viola* an update.
I can pretty much boil it all down to the fact that I haven't seen my girl in a month and a half and hormones suck. Sometimes you just want a guilt-free night of hardcore sex, ya know?
First, my girl's moved out. = Well, kinda.
Thing is that she went back to her mom's place three states away to pick up two kittens they had there, and was going to stay a few weeks so I could get the money situation here straightened out a bit... but she got a job offer as a teacher's assistant for the coming school year while she was back. It pays decently and if she takes it, then she won't have to pay to send her son to school next year either.
Didn't help that when she first told me about it, I completely took it wrong, thought she'd already accepted it and was telling me "Suprise! Not coming back! haha!" ... yeah, that was a great night... don't think I was sober much, but I don't really remember
Still, I'm thinking that it's probably best if she stays there for the coming school year because of a few things... the obvious one is money... neither one of us was really ready to move in together, at least financially anyway. I can get back on my feet, buy up the stuff I've been saving for, etc. Second, I transfer to a new command early next year, so if she keeps her son in school there, by the time he's out of school, I'll have transferred... so he gets a full school year uninterrupted if he stays there.
Another thing is that I'm not sure if I'm ready to settle down... I love the hell outta her, but for some reason I can't keep my eyes in my head, which bugs me to no end. There's more too it, but it's fairly personal (that, and this entry is long enough!)
She already hinted at taking it as a "temporary separation" so we could see other people while we're apart... but I've got issues with that too.. .I mean, what about whoever I'm seeing? I dunno, maybe I'm too old fashioned or too damned sensitive, or just stupid or something. *shrug* I suppose I'd have to make it crystal clear WTF is up if I find someone here. Then again, I doubt I'll find anyone really understanding when they see the apartment, after all, 1/2 the stuff here is her funiture and decoration... *shrug* hehe. Oh well.
Not even gonna get started on work. Lots of dumb stuff going on there. Makes me sad. Anywhoot, more updates later! How much later, I dunno
EDIT: hahah, 5 minutes later and *viola* an update.
I can pretty much boil it all down to the fact that I haven't seen my girl in a month and a half and hormones suck. Sometimes you just want a guilt-free night of hardcore sex, ya know?
If you think you're not ready for that much of a commitment...dont' do it. If you have even the slightest doubt...it means something. You may not think so with as much as you love her or what not...but take it from me. I don't know how much back you read of my entries...but I'm going through a divorce at the young age of 20...and I had doubts when I married the guy...and I should've took consideration to those doubts. Of course thats not why we're divorcing...but still.
Yeah, a lot of things have been going on in my life...but I'm trying to get through it all.
Hope life gets better for you, too!
Take Care
[Edited on Jul 29, 2005 5:19AM]