sqxcm

I had the best day at work yesterday. Travis was there. He is just such a cute kid. I don't even know him, but every time I see him I want to wrap my arms around him. Which makes me, in reality, blush and say stupid things. I did better yesterday than usual, though. I talked to him a little bit. And get this, I went to my car to grab some money to pitch on pizza, and apparently he followed me out, because he came up behind me and scared the shit out of me. It was so cute. Maybe because he said, "Sorry, I had to, you looked so innocent..." Okay, so nobody understood how I think that was cute, but I did. He didn't even make fun the reaction I had when he scared me. And he was looking at me. I'm so dorky. I don't even know this kid. I just know that I want to. And I don't even care that he smokes. I just care that he looks like a kid who will amuse me and make me feel safe and he'll make jokes but they won't offend or degrade me. Or that's what I see, anyway, which doesn't mean that's what's there.
I'm getting such an ego, though. I think a bunch of people at work either want me or hate me, so I'm stuck in limbo between being egotistic and insecure. I should really find a middle ground, to not assume and not get hurt and not bash myself.

Look, I have friends (plural) now.