Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

soulfly

United Kingdom

Member Since 2002

Followers 38 Following 53

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Friday Jun 17, 2005

Jun 16, 2005
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
Woohoo, look what I made at work today!!!!



You should have seen the other guy (ahem!)

That will teach me for not doing what I am told. Bloody machines!!!


Two Aberdonian farmers, Tam and Shuie, are sitting in the
Farmers bar, drinking beer. Tam turns to Shuie and says, "You know, I'm tired of goin' through life withoot an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes."

Shuie thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave.


The next day Tam goes down to the college and meets the Lecturer, who signs him up for the four basic classes: math, English, history, and logic.

"Logic?" Tam says. "Fit's that?"

The Lecturer says, "I'll show you. Do you own a Strimmer?"

"Aye"

"Then logically because you own a Strimmer, I think that you have a Garden."

"That's true, I dae huv a Garden."

"I'm not done," the Lecturer says. "Because you have a Garden, I think logically that you would have a house."
"Aye, I do have a hoose."
"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."
"I have a femily."
"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife."

"Aye, I dae have a wife."

"And because you have a wife, then logically you must be a
heterosexual."

"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing; you were able to find out all of that because I have a strimmer." Excited to take the class now, Tam shakes the Lecturers's hand and leaves to meet Shuie at the pub.

He tells Shuie about his classes, how he is signed up for math, English, history and logic.

"Logic?" Shuie says, "Fit's that?"

Tam says, "I'll show you. Do you have a strimmer?"

"No."

"Then you're a poof."
VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
sistervigilante:
thank you!! yeah the dark days of the evil eye rule are over!!!!! well for now!! yay!!!! dear god tho -- your hand!! hope its healing well!! although you will be left with a scar..but i'm sure you could create a herotic tale of how you got it...saving an old woman from a drugged up junky mugger...who knows wink hehehhe well i hope the hand gets better soon!!! take care kiss
Jun 23, 2005
ladywook:
wow, looks like someone had fun at work
the joys of being an engineer biggrin
Jun 27, 2005

More Blogs

  • 02.19.05
    8

    Saturday Feb 19, 2005

    Read More
  • 02.15.05
    13

    Wednesday Feb 16, 2005

    Okay, better clear this up. Tiddy who appeared in yesterdays journal …
  • 02.14.05
    8

    Tuesday Feb 15, 2005

    Gym + no food + no exercise in 1 1/2 months = bad idea …
  • 02.13.05
    2

    Monday Feb 14, 2005

    Read More
  • 02.09.05
    16

    Wednesday Feb 09, 2005

    Just been watching a repeat of the Simpsons. My favourite episode …
  • 02.08.05
    4

    Tuesday Feb 08, 2005

    My favourite dumbass meaningless lyric of the day I'm a taste test…
  • 02.06.05
    6

    Sunday Feb 06, 2005

    Well this weekend, apart from staying remarkably sober due to purchas…
  • 02.03.05
    6

    Thursday Feb 03, 2005

    Fuck me I can't believe how good a band they were. Megadeth kic…
  • 02.03.05
    4

    Thursday Feb 03, 2005

    Megadeth tonight!!!!!!!! Hoo-haaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! …
  • 01.31.05
    5

    Tuesday Feb 01, 2005

    The why I asked on sunday was more a post hangover 'Why do I get so…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

25
years
1
month
3
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,709 SuicideGirls
  • 1,113,818 followers
  • 15,156,421 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,898,200 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | Safety Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Complaint / Content Removal Policy | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2026

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo