solis

Well, me and my girl, Trish, have broken up again, for the 4th time. I think for good this time. I kinda knew it would happen eventually with the age difference and all. We're just at different stages in our lives for anything to work out longterm. Been at little sad and lonely for the past week but that will pass. She tried to explain why, but couldn't, so i said "I guess you're just over it." Lacking a better way to put it, she agreed.
She was smitten with me at first - older, more experienced, interesting, intelligent, exciting. The first three months was like one of those intense love affairs you see in the movies - very passionate, very sexual, very new. But then the depression hit me again and she started to see a different side to me. Moody, irritable, wanting to be alone all the time, and not very interested in sex. Not much fun at all. For a 20 yr old, it was just too much to cope with. And I don't blame her.
At least I can be happy that I had a positive influence on her life. My influence steered her back to Uni, instead of signing up for the Navy, which i think she would have hated and would have stifled her considerable intellectual potential. She's now glad that she's back (although always complained about how much readings she had to do).
So now I'm in a bit of a transition period and I'm not sure what to do with myself. Maybe I should travel. Maybe I should start making films again. Maybe I should do something I haven't thought of yet.