Tonight further reaffirmed my belief that one of the sole constants of existence is this: offering every ounce of yourself regardless of whether or not you make it known to someone will never under ANY circumstances be good enough.
What really tears me up is not the situation or the reaction... no, what truly rends me asunder is the self-doubt, confusion, and ultimate questioning of whether or not anything conveyed to me was remotely truthful or sincere.
And so I remain, in the same perpetual frame of mind, unable to comprehend exactly what it is that makes me ultimately mediocre or temporary to the few individuals I surrender myself to.
Know this: justify actions as you will, and convince yourself however you wish that you weren't in the wrong, but do not for a second attempt to castigate me for what I felt and what I will continue to feel. I was fully aware of the potential consequences of my actions, and I accept this responsibility with no argument - I will not, however, apologize. Fault is an equivalency, whether conscious or subconcious.
I don't regret any of it.
What really tears me up is not the situation or the reaction... no, what truly rends me asunder is the self-doubt, confusion, and ultimate questioning of whether or not anything conveyed to me was remotely truthful or sincere.
And so I remain, in the same perpetual frame of mind, unable to comprehend exactly what it is that makes me ultimately mediocre or temporary to the few individuals I surrender myself to.
Know this: justify actions as you will, and convince yourself however you wish that you weren't in the wrong, but do not for a second attempt to castigate me for what I felt and what I will continue to feel. I was fully aware of the potential consequences of my actions, and I accept this responsibility with no argument - I will not, however, apologize. Fault is an equivalency, whether conscious or subconcious.
I don't regret any of it.
(No offense ladies)