ok, i know i just updated, but i feel the extremely rare need to gossip 
i appologize ahead of time for the lengthy back-stories, but they add a certain understanding to it all
lately i've been running into people who i have absolutely no clue how to interact with.
my hubby has this friend, who while he is a nice guy, tends to be a bit of a user. i see through him just as clearly as i see through the windshield of my car and he knows it, so he doesn't play me. anyway, he has this... i'll call her a fuckbuddy since she's definitely not a girlfriend who i absolutely can't stand. she thinks adult life is the same as the high-school crap and just won't grow up. i hate her with a passion i normally reserve for people who try to ruin my life directly... yet for some reason i feel the need to restrain myself and make pleasant conversation on the odd times we bump into eachother. this friend of my hubby's also has an ex-girlfriend (who is also the mother of his child, who happens to be 2 or 3 now) who also hates this girl, but they hang out... does that make any sense? i saw them at walmart and had to say hi since i'm friends-of-sorts with the ex. my mom was with me and i had absolutely no clue how to handle the situation, which made it even more awkward.
about 5 years ago, just after i moved here, i met this guy who i though was totally hot. it was love at first sight for me, so i wrote him a note telling him how i felt and asked him to not tell anyone no matter what happened between us. this wasn't something out of the blue, i really thought he was interested because he seemed to go out of his way to talk to me and get to know me and i'm really a hard person to get to know face-to-face. well he thought it was a huge joke and told everyone he knew and they had a big laugh about it. it's something i've never gotten completely over, seeing as how all of these people had been nice to me and seemed to be my friends until i did this. well i happened to see him (at walmart, grocery shopping in the middle of the night again) and the only thing i could think to do is go the other way lest i make a scene. we both have moved on with our lives since then, married, kids, and all that... and i have no doubt that he's forgotten all about it (or at the very least thinks nothing of it anymore) but i'm still so mad i'd chew him a new hole given the opportunity. so if i'm still so mad about it, why do i run away every time i see any member of his family? i'm not afraid of what i'd do... or am i?
and now (finally) to the thing that brought all of this out. tonight while grocery shopping in the middle of the night yet again, i saw a friend of a friend of a friend... of ^that guy^. this girl was a total bitch to me while that whole thing was going on, i mean seriously... every time she saw me it was either some name said barely loud enough for me to hear in passing or some loud whispering behind a hand. maybe she was jealous of my figurative balls to make the first move...? i dunno. she always had this "holier than thou" attitude when i was around. so i see her at walmart while i'm digging through the tv dinners and lo and behold, my good pld backup plan, i play nice. without going into great details she basically tells me that she was wrong to have that attitude and she has done no better than i have, in fact i'm one up on her when it comes to mistakes we've made in life. totally caught me off guard, i was expecting a fight behind the smiles.
so the questions i pose to the few people who either still read my ramblings or just happen to wander by is: has this type of thing happened to you lately or ever at that matter? how did you deal with it? am i right to play nice or should i let my nasty side show? because i'm confused all to hell and even if i never see any of these people again it will still bother me...
i appologize ahead of time for the lengthy back-stories, but they add a certain understanding to it all
lately i've been running into people who i have absolutely no clue how to interact with.
my hubby has this friend, who while he is a nice guy, tends to be a bit of a user. i see through him just as clearly as i see through the windshield of my car and he knows it, so he doesn't play me. anyway, he has this... i'll call her a fuckbuddy since she's definitely not a girlfriend who i absolutely can't stand. she thinks adult life is the same as the high-school crap and just won't grow up. i hate her with a passion i normally reserve for people who try to ruin my life directly... yet for some reason i feel the need to restrain myself and make pleasant conversation on the odd times we bump into eachother. this friend of my hubby's also has an ex-girlfriend (who is also the mother of his child, who happens to be 2 or 3 now) who also hates this girl, but they hang out... does that make any sense? i saw them at walmart and had to say hi since i'm friends-of-sorts with the ex. my mom was with me and i had absolutely no clue how to handle the situation, which made it even more awkward.
about 5 years ago, just after i moved here, i met this guy who i though was totally hot. it was love at first sight for me, so i wrote him a note telling him how i felt and asked him to not tell anyone no matter what happened between us. this wasn't something out of the blue, i really thought he was interested because he seemed to go out of his way to talk to me and get to know me and i'm really a hard person to get to know face-to-face. well he thought it was a huge joke and told everyone he knew and they had a big laugh about it. it's something i've never gotten completely over, seeing as how all of these people had been nice to me and seemed to be my friends until i did this. well i happened to see him (at walmart, grocery shopping in the middle of the night again) and the only thing i could think to do is go the other way lest i make a scene. we both have moved on with our lives since then, married, kids, and all that... and i have no doubt that he's forgotten all about it (or at the very least thinks nothing of it anymore) but i'm still so mad i'd chew him a new hole given the opportunity. so if i'm still so mad about it, why do i run away every time i see any member of his family? i'm not afraid of what i'd do... or am i?
and now (finally) to the thing that brought all of this out. tonight while grocery shopping in the middle of the night yet again, i saw a friend of a friend of a friend... of ^that guy^. this girl was a total bitch to me while that whole thing was going on, i mean seriously... every time she saw me it was either some name said barely loud enough for me to hear in passing or some loud whispering behind a hand. maybe she was jealous of my figurative balls to make the first move...? i dunno. she always had this "holier than thou" attitude when i was around. so i see her at walmart while i'm digging through the tv dinners and lo and behold, my good pld backup plan, i play nice. without going into great details she basically tells me that she was wrong to have that attitude and she has done no better than i have, in fact i'm one up on her when it comes to mistakes we've made in life. totally caught me off guard, i was expecting a fight behind the smiles.
so the questions i pose to the few people who either still read my ramblings or just happen to wander by is: has this type of thing happened to you lately or ever at that matter? how did you deal with it? am i right to play nice or should i let my nasty side show? because i'm confused all to hell and even if i never see any of these people again it will still bother me...
And yeah, that sort of thing has happened. People I've had uncomfortable relationships pop up now and then and it's usually just uncomfortable all over again.
I would have to lean to the side of being civil (if nothing more) to these folks in public -- only because doing otherwise would just make you look bad. Holding all those difficult feelings in, though, isn't healthy for you.
I have to ask you -- what does holding on to the hard feelings do for you? It doesn't sound like it helps much, and just keeps you stewing. My suggestion is to not let these folks continue to have such control over your life. They're not worth it. Relax, know you're better than they are, and let them go on with their petty miserable lives.
Ok, enough psycho-babble.
So what's up with you? Able to get out more?
ever? yes
i kept my head down and pretended to read the ingredients
of something or other until they'd passed
i don't know what i'd do nowadays