Join now and instantly access millions of uncensored photos, videos and livestreams!

Join Now
Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

shellymc

brockton

Member Since 2005

Followers 172 Following 113

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Monday May 01, 2006

May 1, 2006
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
Had a great time hanging in boston yesterday with that abfab duo known as Alyk and Smuffy, we met up for some wonderfully spicy viatnamese food and then took in a movie....
So here's a mini review, and please keep in mind that i'm not giving anything away that any other critic hasn't already mentioned if you have been keeping up with your film reviews.
So if you want to see this movie knowing nothing about it whatsoever... don't continue to read. No spoilers here folks.

"There ain't nothing sweet about "Hard Candy"

14 yr old Haley meets up with her internet photographer buddy Jeff at a cafe. And of course (as she already knows) Jeff is somewhat older and much to her surprise..a bit hunky to boot. After some initial awkward conversation, Haley invites herself over to Jeffs pad so she can listen to some bootlegged Goldfrapp and possibly do a little photoshoot.
Jeff is pretty impressed with the precocious teen, she's a cutie who's wise beyond her years. Plus, she's got some killer abs...
which had me thinking "What the fuck is this girl benchpressing?" whatever
Well next thing you know, Haley's in party mode and mixing up some afternoon cocktails, O.J and vodka to be precise. Absolute straight out of the freezer...because Jeff is cool like that.
then the fun really starts... Jeff finds himself drugged, passes out and wakes up tied to a chair, with his lethal Lolita standing over him.... claws out and potty mouth in full force.
Let the psychological mindgames and torture begin!
see.... it's never questioned that Jeff is a pervert...
i mean he's hanging out in chat rooms with underage chicks. But Haley thinks he's responsible for the vanishing act of another local teen by the name of Donna Mauer.
Is it a case of mistaken identity? Or is Jeff the bonafide villian that Haley thinks he is? What boundaries has he really crossed? and is Haley a bit unhinged herself?

I really liked this film...it had my stomach squirming more than once..(or was that my spicy lunch?)
Ellen Page who plays Haley was a force to be reckoned with in this role, and Patrick Wilson makes Jeff...dare i say it?... somewhat of a sympathetic pervert. Well..at least in my eyes wink

and here's some valuable lessons the film teaches us..
1) be wary of the 14 yr old girl thats already mastering Shakespeare and reads college text books, chances are she has a mensa like I.Q and a few deviant tricks stashed away in her bookbag.
2) never take a mixed cocktail from a stranger, unless you actually witness said cocktail being mixed.
3) If you are going to have a cameo in your film by Sandra Oh...be a little more generous and give her more than four minutes.... chicks got talent!
4) Have an airconditioner in your house... this is the second movie i saw in two weeks in which characters were sweating full force from the heat. or was that from the high tension?
5) It's a good thing to hide all porn when having some lady friends over.... makes you look all sensitive and shit..even if you are a pedophile.

well, thats it in a nutshell...
so i'll wrap up my review by saying this...
Shelly was a sucker for "Hard Candy"
tongue
Get it?

well.... i thought it was kind of funny whatever

xxoo Michelle
VIEW 25 of 138 COMMENTS
surlymike:
Face it, Shel...you're beloved and with good reason. smile
May 4, 2006
abarat:
Oh, my last journal entry was specifically aimed at someone. He knows. Men suck, huh? But I like them so much! biggrin
May 4, 2006

More Blogs

  • 12.31.07
    65

    Monday Dec 31, 2007

    I just wanted to wish all my friends on here a "Happy New years!" …
  • 12.02.07
    55

    Sunday Dec 02, 2007

    John Waters ...... how i love thee in other news Dorwa…
  • 11.05.07
    44

    Tuesday Nov 06, 2007

    there are far worse things in life than being chained to Pam Grier..…
  • 10.26.07
    19

    Friday Oct 26, 2007

    still alive, but no time for a decent update. So i just want to w…
  • 09.19.07
    44

    Wednesday Sep 19, 2007

    well... i was going to try to read and comment back on some friends …
  • 09.12.07
    42

    Wednesday Sep 12, 2007

    wow.... i was long overdue for an update huh? hhmmm... my week …
  • 09.02.07
    51

    Sunday Sep 02, 2007

    I'll play catch up soon enough... i have been guilty of not being on…
  • 08.22.07
    59

    Wednesday Aug 22, 2007

    maggots truly gross me out.. and i had to see about a hundred of t…
  • 08.15.07
    44

    Wednesday Aug 15, 2007

    i love Divine... i actually cried a little when i found out he d…
  • 08.07.07
    60

    Tuesday Aug 07, 2007

    after all these years, "A little romance" still makes me a bit weepy!…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
9
months
9
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,120,514 followers
  • 14,920,612 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,392,861 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

    Press enter to search
    Fast Hi-res

    Click here to join & see it all...

    Crop your photo