Saturday Apr 17, 2010

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aandp:

You're freaking adorable! love

schuldig:

Grats on losing the weight, doesn't it feel just rad? kisslove

Monday Jan 11, 2010

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i've given up meat again.

staring at my plate and seeing an innocent face staring back at me is too cruel...

i hope 2010 is better than 2009.

how are you all doing?!
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
wolfcrap:

eat a different part of the critter.. faces are never easy to eat. jk

Props on the no meat, as long as yer replacing the proteins with an alternative. New look is sexy good time merriment.

hope yer doing good.

ps send me a favorite pic of you or something and I'll probably sketch it up late night.

schuldig:

Hope you return soon. kisslove

Wednesday Oct 14, 2009

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I have officially removed my set smile
jessizzle:

noooooooooo

unknown_user:

Why? frown

Friday Oct 02, 2009

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i am clearly on this site significantly less than when i first started out.

i wanted to do this for SO long, and thought it would be so fun and yadda yadda.
but, for the most part - i have thoroughly disliked it, unfortunately.

i heard bad things about the staff and how the site was run and everything. i just tried to ignore that all...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
destroyer_faith:

I'm sorry to hear they got you down, Scam. As a man on this website, I can tell you it's frustrating when the girls I love and want to see succeed don't get the attention I feel they deserve. And yes, if you look at my friends and favorites list, there are a number of girls that you might think fit into the stereotype of the "same girl" Jessizzle commented about (except the hair- I have a think for short hair). But to me, even the ones that are what social standards judge as "conventionally beautiful" are uniquely beautiful women. I wouldn't have put them on my list or asked to be their friend if this weren't true to me.

We have a lot in common- I also have just about everything SG put out: both hardcovers, both DVDs, a necklace, both series of trading cards, both issues of Papercuts, a hooded sweatshirt, thermal long sleeve shirt, etc, etc.I loved this site for a long time before joining, and since I've been here, I've been subject to some of the same disappointment as you (though obviously different, as I've never put a set up for MR review, what with being a dude). I have posted photos of myself in some of the groups pages that got unpleasant or a complete absence of attention. When I tried to post about wanting to meet someone in my local area on one of the boards I was absolutely ridiculed. I don't hear back on at least 95% of the comments I leave for others. And like yourself, I think if I lost some weight, I'd probably get more and better feedback from the community here.

Like yourself, I am going to try and lose some weight, but it's not because I want to try to fit into other peoples expectations of how I should look to be attractive. Being sexy, erotic, and desirable are states of mind. I'm going to be losing weight because it's starting to wear me out- I can't sleep at night, one of my arms goes numb because of pinched nerves, my back aches all the time, etc.

I'm very damn sorry that you feel like you've got to go away. I'm also sorry you've slipped under my radar- you seem like a great, beautiful woman, and this is the first time I've seen you on the website. Sorry for that- maybe if there were more people supporting you, you'd feel invited to stay.

Although it's probably over-the-line presumptuous, I'm going to tell you what worked for me, and maybe try to encourage you to stick it out a bit longer (and yes, I know it might be different because I'm not a model, and yes, I know the whole e-mail up to this point has been presumptuous). I figured out after about five months that I'm much happier in the community I've established, rather than trying to fit in to the prime collective, so to speak. I've found some great friends that I correspond with often, people I never would have met anywhere else. I've joined some groups that are both serious and fun. I've made an effort to blog more, and always comment on the blogs of people that I really feel connections with. And I'm a lot happier for it. I honestly feel like I belong here now- so much so that I replaced my old profile pic of Citizen Snips with an actual, factual picture of myself.

I'm sorry to see you go, if you decide to do that in the end. Now that I've found you, it's going to be a shame that we won't get to know each other- you seem like the kind of person I'd like to correspond with.

In closing, I'd like to invite you to friend me- I'd like that a whole lot. If you want to leave SG but are still interested in seeing what I'm up to and about, you can friend me on Facebook instead. My name is on my profile, Destroyer_Faith. Look up Suri as well- I'm sure you'd find her a valuable friend on here, if you haven't made her acquaintance yet.

I'm going to leave you with an excerpt and a link to a Brother Ali song that I've taken as my mantra when my body image starts to weigh on me. The songs called "Forest Whitatker."


Ayo, Dependin on the day, and dependin on what I ate
I'm anywhere from 20 to 35 pounds over weight
I got red eyes and one of them's lazy
and they both squint when the sun shines so I look crazy
I'm albino man, I know I'm pink and pale
And I'm hairy as hell, everywhere but fingernails
I shave a cranium that ain't quite shaped right
Face tight, shiny, I stay up and write late nights
My wardrobe is jeans and faded shirts
A mixture of what I like, and what I wear to work
I'm not mean and got a neck full of razor bumps
I'm not the classic profile of what the ladies want
You might think I'm depressed as can be
But when I look in the mirror I see sexy ass me
And if that's somethin that you cant respect then that's peace
My life's better without you actually
To everyone out there, who's a little different
I say damn a magazine, these are gods fingerprints
You can call me ugly but cant take nothing from me
I am what I am doctor you ain't gotta love me


I hope I here back from you Scam. Whether you want to yell at me, start a conversation, or just talk about anything at all, it would be good to see you stick around.

-CxAxH

destroyer_faith:

Thanks for getting back to me Scam. I'll be lookin' out for you . wink

Tuesday Sep 08, 2009

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i want to move out.

is anyone interested in getting a decently priced 2br to rent?

i want... downtown, preferably close to bay, wellesley or the village, etc. will take suggestionsss!
aandp:

i think i might have found a place already. frown

Wednesday Aug 19, 2009

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i am sorta tanked

but taking back sunday wsa amazing.
vigil_:

it's been very long since i went to edge night! obviously the dj is different but it's an alright mix.

Monday Aug 10, 2009

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alright, so clearly... i have given up the hopeful status.

but i still check this out once and a while.

birthday in 2 months, basically (oct.30). and i'm starting to think i wanna do the birthday in toronto.

anyone up for a night of debauchery? i wanna do this right.
aandp:

my birthday is in october too.

woo libra!

Thursday Aug 06, 2009

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it's not showing yet (for me at least), but i have removed my hopeful status.

i am letting my account expire, and no longer desire to be a member of this site.

thanks for the nice comments and stuff, everyone. i'll be on here a bit still, but not posting sets any longer or trying to acquire "pink" status.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
fiend1:

That sucks! Well feel free to add me on myspace or aim to chat sometime! My info is in my profile on here. biggrin

ericfromcanadia:

ah that sucks, holla if you still want to meet up at killswitch engage and every time i die

Wednesday Aug 05, 2009

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seeing tool live was one of the most incredible experiences EVER.

my ex-boyfriend was there. as soon as me and my friend left the venue, i started dwelling on my ex and how heartbroken i still am. it's been two fucking years.

sometimes i think i'm in for an eternity of still loving him
oasis11:

you always will love him, maybe, but YOUR life still goes on right1? smile

Monday Jul 27, 2009

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my internet has been so fucked lately. and my computer and cell phone are barely working at all.
so, sorry that i am lacking!

i've been tanning lots, and for me... i am... DARK-ish. bahaha

i'm going to new york city this weekend and to say the least... i'm fuckin pumped.

i've been feeling really ill, so that's another reason...
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