saraberri

have you ever had one of those nights where you wonder if you just forgot that you got really fucking high, because being wasted is the only way you can explain the people around you?



i've been a bit of a homebody lately, but i went out to meet my friend at a local bar/ restaurant on the water to celebrate her recent baby and her birthday. yay, congrats! looking at the baby pix were the highlight of the evening. also, we've been friends for 11 years and i've seen her in the past two years exactly 4 times.

oh, and this view:



biggest full moon of the year! except. apparently in our area. i was not impressed! but i love this lit up bridge. i would have happily sat on the patio, drinking my glenfiddich and complaining that i've seen bigger moons

but no, we needed to leave and go to a dive bar. we needed to sooo bad that i couldn't even finish my scotch. there's probably no greater way to piss me off than rushing my scotch.

i like dive bars, i do, especially if you've got your crew around you. but this was not the case. all of our mutual friends were at another bar, but they were getting bodypainted and my friend's husband "doesn't approve of that". really, guy, tell me more! this is faaaascinating! you know they're our friends, right? so i guess my friend hasn't shared how she used to drink shots out of my bellybutton on top of a bar every saturday night before she met him. ahhh, marital bliss!

so this conversation, naturally leads to how rapists aren't to blame. direct quote from their male friend to me..."if a woman goes into a nightclub naked, and she gets raped, i mean, who's to blame, right?"
hold on bro, keep talking, i'm lookin for my peppesrpray. and it's not my fault that you're gonna get two eyes full of pepperspray because you're an asshole and i can't be held accountable because you were asking for it. he brought this up again, 5 minutes later. apparently because once was just not enough. but in between, this happens:

wasted girl comes over, eats my friend's face for a while in an overly friendly hug, asks her to hold her phone and then proceeds to pull her dress up over her head while yelling "LINDSAY LOHAN" for no conceivable reason after someone points out to her that she's still got the sales tag from the store on the side hem of her dress. she never removes this tag, but shows us her underwear twice again, also displaying an impressive amount of recent bruises, one of which is in the shape of a hand. i gave serious consideration to going through her phone and deleting every male contact she had in it. it seemed like she might need help making decisions. i might just save her life. i could be like a new superhero. besides these people, there are 7 other people in the entire place. and they're playing dubstep. seriously? take a look at your clientele. dubstep?


completely gratuitous photo of me.

NOW, cue the fucking moron rape apologist who comes over to make the point of telling me he's not sorry for what he said because he doesn't think about what he says before he says them.

get me the fuck out of here.

i survived 2 hours.

and, and in totally unrelated news, why is this the new duckface?