what i wished i had said -
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Dear Divorced Guy:
I'm very sorry to hear about what you are going through. Really, no - I'm REALLY SORRY to be hearing this - STOP talking about it. i don't care about your divorce - are you telling me about the split in gory detail because you hope i will join you in divorce-land and we will happily cry on each other's shoulders for all eternity? or have you just exhausted all the sympathetic ears of people you actually know, and are reduced to burdening near-strangers. Why would you think it's appropriate to come into my office and tell me how you are a great guy being taken advantage by your ex? Because once you told me that yea, you fucked up, you met a woman, you had an affair, you feel awful, but does she really have to rake you over the coals like this?- i was so horrified at the level of personal TMI being unleashed in my private professional space that i realized you had done what few others have - left me speechless. i'm sorry i could only nod openmouthed in shock while you took a figurative emotional dump in my office, because my mind was filled only with-'whenwillthisend? ohMYGODhe's STILLTALKING'. You continued to follow me to the copier, ignoring all polite attempts to disengage from this painfully over-personal conversation, where you told me you just don't want to be alone. This was more than unburdening yourself at someone else's expense, it was e worst pick up attempt i have been yet subjected to. This hell only ended because the office manager came back from lunch. I shudder to think how long it would have gone on if you hadn't been interrupted. how many more piercings and tattoos must i get before i do not appear to be a good listener? I cultivate an unapproachable exterior. it's not a facade, my distaste for others failings at life goes through to the core of me, it's a genuine part of my being. Why do you people find my office a comforting place? You are not the first Divorced Guy, add to that Weeping College Girl and Hysterical Middle -Aged Woman, and I am at the end of my rope. I mean that, swinging at the end of a rope is less painful than listening to you losers.
spoilered due to length of the note, although actual encounter was much, much longer. i need your help, people - i MUST deal with the public - does anyone have ideas for a professional way to shut someone up? because all i can come up with is to tell them they fail at life, and suggest they go drown their sorrows at the bar across the street. i would never suggest suicide to someone, but all i'm thinking is that some people should keep all their options open. all i'm saying.
then, after a few minutes say: "if you really wanted to talk about this you would pick a time and a person who was capable of giving you their full attention. This is not the time and I am not that person, so please deal with your own denial professionally when you are ready to get real help."