roamingaround

Saw two excellent shows tonight:

1. Mimi's very evocative, very talented band, Black Forest/Black Sea. The best bookstore gig I've ever seen in my life.

2. Mindflayer (with some other great bands) in downtown Providence. The last time I saw them was three years ago....and I've missed them terribly. The noise is fucking cathartic!

Whenever I go to shows alone (which I do a...
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I have in my possession:

-a bag of soy flour
-one cup of heavy cream
-half a container of sour cream
-wasabi powder
-olive oil
-frozen chicken

and that HAS to suffice until Saturday.

Suggestions?

Do you ever drink so much coffee that you turn paranoid? The day just kept getting more and more twisted, and I felt the anxiety rising in my limbs, making the muscles contract. Things turned violent in the evening. J threw me against the fridge really hard, and I know I deserved it. He held me there until I calmed down.

When I finally crashed,...
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She said I have a tendency to run away, but I don't think it's true---I run, but not always away from things, sometimes towards them, or alongside, and occasionally I crash, pull them close, or push them down. Like a chasing game.

I told him he was being paranoid, not to ask me questions like that, and I secretly hated myself, because I had allowed...
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(I love watching the scenery slide along, the wrecked cement and wires, graffiti, how dead it all looks, and so decrepit that it's breathtaking. When I'm on a train, my brain falls silent, and I feel like I can see the hidden parts of civilization, especially in New Jersey, where I can look out into the fog and watch the smoke billow from factories, and...
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Here goes. Bloggy blog blog:

-Saw The Epoxies in New York on Friday. Loved them, loved them.
-Didn't play a show on Saturday. Practiced instead, because we needed it. Practiced again this afternoon. We've got a REAL show in two weeks, and we're going to be so fucking ready....
-Made a really nice dinner for my family. Made a splash page for the band website....
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Now I get to go away for the weekend, see a show and play a show, drink tea with my Ma, watch cable, and just generally enjoy the empty luxuries of early 21st century living.

I leave you with questions:

-What?
-How often?
-Want one?

We could float down the Mississippi on a raft, screaming obscenities and waving at people, eating snacks, fishing, talking about "life" and "love," sumo wrestling, doing reverse stripteases, stealing each other's underwear and throwing it overboard...even Mark Twain couldn't imagine all the things we'd do, all the fun we'd have on our little raft...

It's 10 o'clock. Should I

...have a solo dance party to The Pagans' Pink Album?

...engage in 10-second flirtation with the cashier at the mini-mart (under the guise of "buying gum")?

...write the Great American Sentence?

I've been editing undergrad sociology papers for hours and it's fucking with my head. The papers all claim that alcohol does not chemically alter human behavior, but instead provides a socially sanctioned excuse for behavioral change. In other words, drunken violence and all that other fun stuff can be blamed on society, not individuals.

I never took sociology in college. All I know is this:...
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So according to this brochure I picked up on Saturday, I should be doing a breast self-exam every month or something. But I, um, have no arms. Any volunteers?

I also seem to have misplaced my mouth. Has it latched on to any of you? It's sooo naughty....

"I'm sorry, I can't do it with you looking at me like that."

"What?"

"I don't know. You're eyes are piercing me."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No, no. It's fine. I had to go really bad a minute ago, I swear, so I don't know what's going on."

"I can leave if you want. It's no big deal."

"No, I want you to...
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