wow.
i'm still good friends with my ex-fiancee -- we don't hang out or anything silly like that, but we can still hold a damned fine conversation for an hour or two when some excuse comes up to call one another. he still has some of my furniture, i have all three of our cats, he has my old car, etc. there's always some reason to call and chat every once in a while.
he's moving at the end of the month, and left a message yesterday asking if i wanted this and that back before he gave them away or sold them. i returned his call tonight and we talked for a bit. i asked him how his somewhat tumultuous new relationship was going, with the girl that i like to refer to as "Arm Candy."
(and oh yes, that is a poisonous bitchy insult, coming from me. it's just too easy when your very smart ex has a very dumb broad living in his bed.)
he talked about this, and he talked about that. she's older than he is, but acts younger, doesn't have her shit together, makes virtually no money, expects everything and then some from him. "payback's a bitch, huh?" i asked, laughing, referring to the nearly identical scenario that occurred when he moved in with me some years past. he was fresh out of the college dorms, and i had nearly ten years experience of being on my own. you can imagine how well *that* went.
he laughed, too. "yeah, i know. and hey --"
and then he apologized.
this man who was always, always right about everything. who never apologized for even so much as leaving the toilet seat up.
he apologized.
"i'm.... i'm sorry for those two years. i *was* pushing you away, you weren't crazy. i thought you would want to know."
it's water under the bridge. i'm over it and then some, aside from an occasional wistful moment of wishing it had worked out, usually after one of those long, easy conversations.
still, i'll take the apology. and gracefully, at that.
i'm still good friends with my ex-fiancee -- we don't hang out or anything silly like that, but we can still hold a damned fine conversation for an hour or two when some excuse comes up to call one another. he still has some of my furniture, i have all three of our cats, he has my old car, etc. there's always some reason to call and chat every once in a while.
he's moving at the end of the month, and left a message yesterday asking if i wanted this and that back before he gave them away or sold them. i returned his call tonight and we talked for a bit. i asked him how his somewhat tumultuous new relationship was going, with the girl that i like to refer to as "Arm Candy."
(and oh yes, that is a poisonous bitchy insult, coming from me. it's just too easy when your very smart ex has a very dumb broad living in his bed.)
he talked about this, and he talked about that. she's older than he is, but acts younger, doesn't have her shit together, makes virtually no money, expects everything and then some from him. "payback's a bitch, huh?" i asked, laughing, referring to the nearly identical scenario that occurred when he moved in with me some years past. he was fresh out of the college dorms, and i had nearly ten years experience of being on my own. you can imagine how well *that* went.
he laughed, too. "yeah, i know. and hey --"
and then he apologized.
this man who was always, always right about everything. who never apologized for even so much as leaving the toilet seat up.
he apologized.
"i'm.... i'm sorry for those two years. i *was* pushing you away, you weren't crazy. i thought you would want to know."
it's water under the bridge. i'm over it and then some, aside from an occasional wistful moment of wishing it had worked out, usually after one of those long, easy conversations.
still, i'll take the apology. and gracefully, at that.
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Kidding aside, how great are those overdue statements? The stakes are lowered. There aren't huge waves afterwards. Just a statement of something you've known all along. It's like the smell of cedar.