So I just got pseudo-dumped.
Only pseudo because it was kind of an inevitability really and I was basically waiting for her to take initiative so that I wouldn't have to.
Basic scenario is this: she moved away about a month ago to go to school, amidst heavy reservations that the long-distance bullcrap wouldn't work. I was pretty sure it wasn't going to either, but I'd no idea how I'd really feel about it so I agreed to give it a shot. Frankly, I thought the distance would be somewhat healthy as we'd found ourselves in the situation where we were just used to spending loads of time together and couldn't do anything about it. Even habits you want to break are hard to do -- hell, I'm updating a web journal at 5:00 AM when I've been telling myself for two weeks I need to start going to bed earlier. I also didn't practice my drums today. See what I mean?
So I was supposed to visit her this weekend but she ended up being too busy with schoolwork. I'd pretty much gotten the sense that something was "up", so to speak, given the way she was talking on the phone and wasn't jumping at the chance for me to go visit her. And frankly, if you act completely blah to me driving for 3 hours one-way to see you, I'm probably not going to make the effort. I hope that I wouldn't expect anything but that where the roles reversed, but we're all hypocrites, so who knows. Anyway, I get another email today saying that she doesn't think we're right for each other, right now.
Not to say she isn't right.
This isn't a bitch fest, or me lactating estrogen in some weepy emo confessional. It's kind of just a news update. And, I won't lie: I'm really exploring my own feelings about the whole situation simply by describing it. Though at this point I haven't managed to dig any deeper.
And you know what else? There are lots of people around. I can't promise that being "single" will help me meet people...in fact, I tend to be far more outgoing and natural when I'm not worried about meeting people because I'm in a relationship. But the people are there, that's for sure. Plus, it's a great line to make plans with people. "Hey, my girlfriend dumped me. Let's go do something."
So, here's to new leaves. Hopefully under some of them lie the ability to go to bed when I should, do my "homework" (i.e. practice, you lazy bastard) more, and not be such a shut-in.
Only pseudo because it was kind of an inevitability really and I was basically waiting for her to take initiative so that I wouldn't have to.
Basic scenario is this: she moved away about a month ago to go to school, amidst heavy reservations that the long-distance bullcrap wouldn't work. I was pretty sure it wasn't going to either, but I'd no idea how I'd really feel about it so I agreed to give it a shot. Frankly, I thought the distance would be somewhat healthy as we'd found ourselves in the situation where we were just used to spending loads of time together and couldn't do anything about it. Even habits you want to break are hard to do -- hell, I'm updating a web journal at 5:00 AM when I've been telling myself for two weeks I need to start going to bed earlier. I also didn't practice my drums today. See what I mean?
So I was supposed to visit her this weekend but she ended up being too busy with schoolwork. I'd pretty much gotten the sense that something was "up", so to speak, given the way she was talking on the phone and wasn't jumping at the chance for me to go visit her. And frankly, if you act completely blah to me driving for 3 hours one-way to see you, I'm probably not going to make the effort. I hope that I wouldn't expect anything but that where the roles reversed, but we're all hypocrites, so who knows. Anyway, I get another email today saying that she doesn't think we're right for each other, right now.
Not to say she isn't right.
This isn't a bitch fest, or me lactating estrogen in some weepy emo confessional. It's kind of just a news update. And, I won't lie: I'm really exploring my own feelings about the whole situation simply by describing it. Though at this point I haven't managed to dig any deeper.
And you know what else? There are lots of people around. I can't promise that being "single" will help me meet people...in fact, I tend to be far more outgoing and natural when I'm not worried about meeting people because I'm in a relationship. But the people are there, that's for sure. Plus, it's a great line to make plans with people. "Hey, my girlfriend dumped me. Let's go do something."
So, here's to new leaves. Hopefully under some of them lie the ability to go to bed when I should, do my "homework" (i.e. practice, you lazy bastard) more, and not be such a shut-in.
xox.