Okay...so up front, I'm still going to be okay. I'm going to be positive as much as possible and I'm going to NOT be a crazy not-girlfriend. But I have to vent real quick...
So the ex-gf is here with the man that i want to spend my life with. I'm sorta okay with it because I know that he needs to be sure that the relationship with K is over. I def would not want him figuring out that he wasn't sure 5 years from now. But I'm so going out of my mind not knowing what's going on. I mean, have they spent the last three days blissfully together and he's thinking that he wants her to stay here for a lot longer because he still isn't sure? Does he realize why they broke up the first time 6 years ago and doesn't want anything to do with her and he's just waiting for her to leave?
i know that it's not by business and that me involving myself in it would make things harder and more complicated for him. So I haven't been. It takes every ounce of self control for me not to text him when something funny happens. or sucky happens. or awesome happens. or when I need help with my homework. I mean, that's what people who are dating are supposed to do...but we aren't dating. He asked me specifically not to talk to or text him outside of work while she is here. But i don't even know how long that is. I really want to know when she is leaving so I can figure out how many packs of cigarettes I need to buy. Ughh...
Okay, I feel better. The house is getting cleaned and I have 1 more quiz to take then the exam. I've done as much of the labs as possible and have emailed the prof with the questions that I have...the same questions everyone else in class has...but they aren't answering. So, if I can get the quiz and 1 discussion done today, I can do the exam on Tuesday, labs on Wed (hopefully) and leave for Florida on Thursday with nothing hanging over my head....except you know, not being sure if the guy that says he loves me doesn't also love someone else...which I believe is possible. But I'd like to know that.
He seems to be taking an internet break, so hopefully he won't read this until after it's all said and done. I wish I could make it completely private. Open to no one but me...anyone know how to do that??
So the ex-gf is here with the man that i want to spend my life with. I'm sorta okay with it because I know that he needs to be sure that the relationship with K is over. I def would not want him figuring out that he wasn't sure 5 years from now. But I'm so going out of my mind not knowing what's going on. I mean, have they spent the last three days blissfully together and he's thinking that he wants her to stay here for a lot longer because he still isn't sure? Does he realize why they broke up the first time 6 years ago and doesn't want anything to do with her and he's just waiting for her to leave?
i know that it's not by business and that me involving myself in it would make things harder and more complicated for him. So I haven't been. It takes every ounce of self control for me not to text him when something funny happens. or sucky happens. or awesome happens. or when I need help with my homework. I mean, that's what people who are dating are supposed to do...but we aren't dating. He asked me specifically not to talk to or text him outside of work while she is here. But i don't even know how long that is. I really want to know when she is leaving so I can figure out how many packs of cigarettes I need to buy. Ughh...
Okay, I feel better. The house is getting cleaned and I have 1 more quiz to take then the exam. I've done as much of the labs as possible and have emailed the prof with the questions that I have...the same questions everyone else in class has...but they aren't answering. So, if I can get the quiz and 1 discussion done today, I can do the exam on Tuesday, labs on Wed (hopefully) and leave for Florida on Thursday with nothing hanging over my head....except you know, not being sure if the guy that says he loves me doesn't also love someone else...which I believe is possible. But I'd like to know that.
He seems to be taking an internet break, so hopefully he won't read this until after it's all said and done. I wish I could make it completely private. Open to no one but me...anyone know how to do that??