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raen

Member Since 2003

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Monday Nov 03, 2008

Nov 3, 2008
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alright folks, it is time to pray with all your might.........
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
loretta:
smile
sounds promising tongue
haha
Nov 23, 2008
thefly:

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

I quit my therapist because I realized two things (which are actually one): 1. no matter what I said he kept repeating only one issue that shaped my life as if seeing a friend killed in front of me (didn't happen to me, just using as an example) didn't need to be discussed and blamed for fucked-upness as much as verbal abuse from a parent (also, didn't happen), and 2. I stopped trusting him. yeah, I have trust issues but this guy reached a point where everything stemmed from one issue and that was the one thing I needed to face. That, and I think it was therapy for him as much as for me. Very talkative, that one.

He has been calling to check on me but I'm never here or asleep when he calls. Having taken a break he tried me again yesterday. Ironic, he mentioned how he just started reading my novel. It would have done both of us more good if he had done that before. Oh, and he compared my psyche to a story he had started to read of mine... BUT IT WASN'T MY STORY HE COMPARED ME TO! Yeah, it must have been time to move on; I feel better now than I did when I had him.




I did quit caffeine and have lost almost all traces of chest pain. Who knew, caffeine is a killer. It's interesting giving up one's only vice. Mindset has been more stable since. I think we all are selfish when it comes to the pieces of our lives, be it cigarettes and even our psychoses. Why do I have to give mine up? She doesn't! Why must I change, he isn't. Silly, really. We shape our own selves but we do so with the perspective from others. Whose really to blame I keep wondering.

I don't offer advice otherwise I'd put it here. The thing that keeps me centered right now is thinking "at least I'm not Juliana Wetmore."

Nov 24, 2008

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