all right as long as I'm here I'll post a much more interesting-bizarro dream I had, I think it was the last dream i recorded before that. I used to have this long document with lots of dreams in it but where the fuck is it? 
any way in the meantime...I might have to edit this because this is exactly how I wrote it:
9/24/05 6am
I dreamed I was working with a documentary filmmmaker in some locale (a rural setting)
there was a romantic/sexual situation we'd been involved with in some other identity
but the part I remember from the dream starts here:
We'd been embodying a lesbian relationship, taking on the identity of these two women in a secret, crazy love like being possessed by their ghosts.
so when my lover asks me to get into he car I think we're going to make out secretly, I'm excited but I'm also excited and swept up in the stlory.
but then the past/story reality begins to collide with my own identity
he's put me into this intimate setting so we can have an important talk as two filmmakers who have come here to research a story and found themselves embodying the people they were researching
so they've been living out a lesbian relationship, but now the reality that they're actually two straight men kicks in.
he starts by saying, "I talked with some editors I know..."
I say -- I hope it was not anybody I know. (then I brush it aside and say
well I'm really beyond caring about that. I'm kidding.
he starts to say something looking very grave and concerned
I say "they warned you about lingering emotional attachment that might happen in this situation. you're about to ask me if I'm okay with everything now that it's...'over.'"
he gets a cell phone call and I have a chance to deal with all the different internal viewpoints I have
I didn't even think of this heading toward a kind of "breakup" until now. But now that he thought to have this speech I feel strange, a little dissed. I have a girlfriend. Why does he think I would remain emotionally involved with him? Somehow I'm resentful because I would have been fine if he hadn't said anything, and now I feel like he's put up a barrier where we can't really talk about the craziness of what we've shared, share even the amazing experience of being possessed by these people, by living as two lesbian lovers, like he wants to distance himself emotionally from it. And in a strange way he's made me occupy the emotional vantage point of someone who was jilted. He's reduced this into a straight-guy thing, made me feel like he's "straight" and I'm not. The amazement and joy of living out the experience was something I wanted to talk about with him, but now he's shut the door on that. He's throwing away the most amazing thing that ever happened to him, what an idiot!
ART IDEAS:
back story: two women from earlier repressive time live out a doomed relationship.
the two filmmakers have come here to figure out how to recreate the story
the story comes to live as they re-envision it
they're even turned on by the pictures of the women
(question: focus on each emotional moment and character development for the four characters, rather than ghost-story genre tropes of some mystical transmission)
the men walk in the women's footsteps
[up to that rock pool up in North Carolina]
the women/men kiss each other for the first time
then the scene of the lovers' doom/breakup parallels the "breakup" of the filmmakers
any way in the meantime...I might have to edit this because this is exactly how I wrote it:
9/24/05 6am
I dreamed I was working with a documentary filmmmaker in some locale (a rural setting)
there was a romantic/sexual situation we'd been involved with in some other identity
but the part I remember from the dream starts here:
We'd been embodying a lesbian relationship, taking on the identity of these two women in a secret, crazy love like being possessed by their ghosts.
so when my lover asks me to get into he car I think we're going to make out secretly, I'm excited but I'm also excited and swept up in the stlory.
but then the past/story reality begins to collide with my own identity
he's put me into this intimate setting so we can have an important talk as two filmmakers who have come here to research a story and found themselves embodying the people they were researching
so they've been living out a lesbian relationship, but now the reality that they're actually two straight men kicks in.
he starts by saying, "I talked with some editors I know..."
I say -- I hope it was not anybody I know. (then I brush it aside and say
well I'm really beyond caring about that. I'm kidding.he starts to say something looking very grave and concerned
I say "they warned you about lingering emotional attachment that might happen in this situation. you're about to ask me if I'm okay with everything now that it's...'over.'"
he gets a cell phone call and I have a chance to deal with all the different internal viewpoints I have
I didn't even think of this heading toward a kind of "breakup" until now. But now that he thought to have this speech I feel strange, a little dissed. I have a girlfriend. Why does he think I would remain emotionally involved with him? Somehow I'm resentful because I would have been fine if he hadn't said anything, and now I feel like he's put up a barrier where we can't really talk about the craziness of what we've shared, share even the amazing experience of being possessed by these people, by living as two lesbian lovers, like he wants to distance himself emotionally from it. And in a strange way he's made me occupy the emotional vantage point of someone who was jilted. He's reduced this into a straight-guy thing, made me feel like he's "straight" and I'm not. The amazement and joy of living out the experience was something I wanted to talk about with him, but now he's shut the door on that. He's throwing away the most amazing thing that ever happened to him, what an idiot!
ART IDEAS:
back story: two women from earlier repressive time live out a doomed relationship.
the two filmmakers have come here to figure out how to recreate the story
the story comes to live as they re-envision it
they're even turned on by the pictures of the women
(question: focus on each emotional moment and character development for the four characters, rather than ghost-story genre tropes of some mystical transmission)
the men walk in the women's footsteps
[up to that rock pool up in North Carolina]
the women/men kiss each other for the first time
then the scene of the lovers' doom/breakup parallels the "breakup" of the filmmakers