the truth about skydiving:
i really wanted it to be the most exciting thing i did... ever. i wanted to be shaking on the way up, at the edge of the door, and on the way down. the fact is i felt very little. at times i felt like a dot falling to earth. and looking around i thought 'cool, everything is so beautiful' and...
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i really wanted it to be the most exciting thing i did... ever. i wanted to be shaking on the way up, at the edge of the door, and on the way down. the fact is i felt very little. at times i felt like a dot falling to earth. and looking around i thought 'cool, everything is so beautiful' and...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
gone skydiving... be back later. maybe.
i saw a band on wednesday nite that was way more interesting, different and entertaining than anything i'm involved with or anyone around here for that matter. i called the guys who were a few blocks away and begged them to come see this band... me and 3 other people watched this incredible show. the guys never showed. watching this band kick my ass at...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
quadrod:
there's my mind. welcome back... i missed you. sweet fucked up mind.
[Edited on Dec 05, 2003 8:10AM]
[Edited on Dec 05, 2003 8:10AM]
looking over my last few entries, i realize everything i write comes across suicidal... it seems to be my nature to write sad shit. most of my music comes out like this. i don't think i come across like that in person. at least i hope not.
so anyway, today is my aunts funeral. i'll have to see my dads side of the family. i...
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so anyway, today is my aunts funeral. i'll have to see my dads side of the family. i...
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quadrod:
my uncle vale played at the funeral. i dont think i've ever seen him play before. he played while they lowered the casket into the grave. strange. even weirder, my aunt was burried 3 graves over from my dad. not planned. in the 25 years that my dad has been dead, no ones ever saved up money for a tombstone, all it has is a crappy metal tag that used to have his name on it... it's worn off now. very fitting. my dad was an asshole to my mom, and i really didnt know him. he died 2 1/2 weeks before my 8th birthday. he died sept 18 1978 and my brother jesse died sept 10 1993, almost exactly 15 years apart. jesse was always kind of an asshole to me, but the rest of the family seems to remember him differently. but i still liked him for the most part. really because of him i'm a musician.
saw all my cousins today, my uncle looks so old now. didnt recognize me... i didnt realize it, but he's the last one left of my dads family.
also, today was the first time in a long long time that my whole family was together. minus jesse and my dad.
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i have a job interview on tuesday the 9th... please rod... don't fuck this up.
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today: at the urinal at the restroom of the restaurant... food wasn't very good though... ha.. made myself laugh.
saw all my cousins today, my uncle looks so old now. didnt recognize me... i didnt realize it, but he's the last one left of my dads family.
also, today was the first time in a long long time that my whole family was together. minus jesse and my dad.
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i have a job interview on tuesday the 9th... please rod... don't fuck this up.
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today: at the urinal at the restroom of the restaurant... food wasn't very good though... ha.. made myself laugh.
i just found out my aunt died. my dads side of the family keeps getting smaller. one of his brothers looks just like him, i haven't seen him in so long, i guess i'll see him tomorrow at the funeral. i always freak out at how much he and my dad looked alike. everytime theres a death in my family like this, i think about...
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kinda worried about morli... haven't talked to her in about a week.
she mentioned being in a car wreck and her being depressed about her wedding pictures really sucking. i looked on her erotic story board and she's been posting, so i guess she's ok... plus she's put up some new peeing pics... anyway.
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allegra has found herself a guy... good, i feel more...
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she mentioned being in a car wreck and her being depressed about her wedding pictures really sucking. i looked on her erotic story board and she's been posting, so i guess she's ok... plus she's put up some new peeing pics... anyway.
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allegra has found herself a guy... good, i feel more...
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little black cloud
i guess i am
mornings are so hard for me
another day
ears ringing
unmotivated
pretend to be interested
sexual deviance
numb
annoyed
tired
bored
and lost
...
dj-ing tonight at the davenport(sp?), sounds like it will be a pain in the ass. i'll have to listen to chris' idea of hip music. i'll slip in my idea of hip music.
......
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i guess i am
mornings are so hard for me
another day
ears ringing
unmotivated
pretend to be interested
sexual deviance
numb
annoyed
tired
bored
and lost
...
dj-ing tonight at the davenport(sp?), sounds like it will be a pain in the ass. i'll have to listen to chris' idea of hip music. i'll slip in my idea of hip music.
......
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
infidel:
Where's your fave SG chicks......
It seems the best bands have to all play together to get anyone out...the Johnny Cash thing at T-land last night wasn't bad on turn out....
tonight, probably just go dancing with B or something.....
I'm a little tired of my BS gig as well....I've been thinking of sitting in with other bands that need a drummer just to shake the dust off.....seeing Suzy play last night with no drummer really had me sitting on my hands....
It seems the best bands have to all play together to get anyone out...the Johnny Cash thing at T-land last night wasn't bad on turn out....
tonight, probably just go dancing with B or something.....
I'm a little tired of my BS gig as well....I've been thinking of sitting in with other bands that need a drummer just to shake the dust off.....seeing Suzy play last night with no drummer really had me sitting on my hands....
quadrod:
i tried adding my fave sg girls but i guess i didnt do it right... i have such a hard on for luxe. i dont think she's active on here anymore... just my luck.
i was out at the Cash thing for a little while, but was so tired from work and no one interesting to talk to, i gave up... i've become such a puss and extremely picky about my company.
i dont know what it takes for people to come out anymore... i'm just extremely burned out right now in every possible way. seeing such a poor turn out, not just at our shows, is very difficult for me to take. i;ve been begging chris to get us gigs somewhere other than tacoland... we're playing at the Davenport on the 6th... but i think it's completely the wrong place... whatever. right now i just dont care about what i'm doing musically. i've talked to patrick about doing something... i need to get off my ass for it, he seems interested.
thanks for the reply... i forgot people could/would read this. i'm mostly, well maybe 98% honest on this thing. as time goes by, i realise i dont give a shit what people know about me or not... except info that might hurt others... that i'm careful of.
i was out at the Cash thing for a little while, but was so tired from work and no one interesting to talk to, i gave up... i've become such a puss and extremely picky about my company.
i dont know what it takes for people to come out anymore... i'm just extremely burned out right now in every possible way. seeing such a poor turn out, not just at our shows, is very difficult for me to take. i;ve been begging chris to get us gigs somewhere other than tacoland... we're playing at the Davenport on the 6th... but i think it's completely the wrong place... whatever. right now i just dont care about what i'm doing musically. i've talked to patrick about doing something... i need to get off my ass for it, he seems interested.
thanks for the reply... i forgot people could/would read this. i'm mostly, well maybe 98% honest on this thing. as time goes by, i realise i dont give a shit what people know about me or not... except info that might hurt others... that i'm careful of.
was kind of a bad gig.
poor turn out... i feel theres not much interest in the band or any band in town actually... people just don't come out. i dont really blame them. i rather go to a club and listen to a dj spin my favorite old bauhaus songs. i think i've completely lost interest in this band. i was pretty bored actually....
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poor turn out... i feel theres not much interest in the band or any band in town actually... people just don't come out. i dont really blame them. i rather go to a club and listen to a dj spin my favorite old bauhaus songs. i think i've completely lost interest in this band. i was pretty bored actually....
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quadrod:
i wasn't drunk enough last night. thats all. 
happy thanksgiving rod.
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allegra didn't come home last night... hope she had fun.
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ryans buffet for thanksgiving 5th year in a row. aw yeah.
happy thanksgiving rod.
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allegra didn't come home last night... hope she had fun.
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ryans buffet for thanksgiving 5th year in a row. aw yeah.
quadrod:
i just realized i've been putting happy faces everywhere.
i want to know what mood i was in... so:
i want to know what mood i was in... so:
robot boy show tonight at tacoland. been really looking forward to playing. seriously working on some music for my own band... sounds pretty bad. aw yeah...
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i have the house to myself tonight, so nice. i can't wait to live on my own. this weeks schedule has been so good for me. i still feel like such a putz... i'm sure i was sort...
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i have the house to myself tonight, so nice. i can't wait to live on my own. this weeks schedule has been so good for me. i still feel like such a putz... i'm sure i was sort...
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SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIT!
I JUST GOT OFF WORK!
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but i feel fine... good actually.
don't know... might be the thingies.
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aw yeah.
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yup.
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keeping away from family helps.
looking forward to skydiving.
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today: or yesterday rather: at lunch at the restroom of borders...hehehe.
I JUST GOT OFF WORK!
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but i feel fine... good actually.
don't know... might be the thingies.
...
aw yeah.
...
yup.
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keeping away from family helps.
looking forward to skydiving.
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today: or yesterday rather: at lunch at the restroom of borders...hehehe.
a little bummed today, had to start taking down my home studio so i can sell the house. tougher than i thought. i told one of the guys in the band and they said "we need to hurry up and finish the album then..."
nice. and i actually wanted some kind of sympathy...
i forget the studio is what interests some people about me. good... Read More
duran duran last night =
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drove around town today visiting some cool places i like to be at alone. nice chill in the air.
smoked pot at this very cool huge drainage pipe. watched some ants carrying their little trophies.
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today: at the huge drainage pipe.
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nice day.
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drove around town today visiting some cool places i like to be at alone. nice chill in the air.
smoked pot at this very cool huge drainage pipe. watched some ants carrying their little trophies.
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today: at the huge drainage pipe.
...
nice day.
quadrod:
fuck... i love the cold! makes me that much more... frisky, i guess. also makes listening to old cure cassettes in the the car that much better. i love how the sound of trains gets carried so far a way in the cold weather, and everything looks cleaner to me.
took a bunch of pictures today.
i think i have my mind back. at least for now.
gonna get my drink on tonight. aw yeah... sheeeeee-it.
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last night on the way back from duran duran, chris and i saw the biggest shooting star/meteor/space debris we'd ever seen. we both commented on how amazing it was. being the big ass dork i am, i made a wish... the magnetic fields are turning me into such a pussy.
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second time today: i pulled over on the side of the road on the south side of town. felt good in the cold.
took a bunch of pictures today.
i think i have my mind back. at least for now.
gonna get my drink on tonight. aw yeah... sheeeeee-it.
...
last night on the way back from duran duran, chris and i saw the biggest shooting star/meteor/space debris we'd ever seen. we both commented on how amazing it was. being the big ass dork i am, i made a wish...
the magnetic fields are turning me into such a pussy.
...
second time today: i pulled over on the side of the road on the south side of town. felt good in the cold.
edited because that sounds really crass...but...ummm...so?
[Edited on Dec 07, 2003 9:12PM]
just 'testing the water' to see if one would go for it... i have no idea if she has it in her to have this kind of secret or even wants me for that matter.