pudding

so where did i run off to you may ask? i spent sunday in icu at wmmc under suicide watch and the next three days in a mental health facility in kansas city. what brought me to icu? well lets be honest, and i mean brutally honest. i don't want your pity so if you find yourself thinking to that tune you can fuck off. i was suicidally depressed. that is the short and long of the whole thing, i wanted to open a vein. i got to the point where i felt i was a danger to myself, it's a bad sign when you don't feel safe in your own company. so i took the necessary steps to get help. i feel much better now, more centered, happier to be alive. i now have a therapist again who i will see once a week. i am on a new medicine, geodon in addition to my other meds. i don't ever want to go back to the crazy hut, but i have said that before. this time i mean it, i no longer want to wallow in my dysfunction and misery. as a gift to myself i got my sideburns pierced, they look bad ass. i don't know what else to say. at this point i think i just have to start putting my life back in order.