pubert

I'm crying uncontrolably and shivering in an 90degree apartment over what i did to that little girl. Everyone who hits someone at one point swears they'll never again...unfortinatly the majority of which never mean it. I can't afford to lose that little girl. I've reasoned it out in my head in that her mom will probly never want me back in her life to my previous degree in which I once was. If thats the case i can live with it. But the love of a child is eternal. I'm thinking bout joining the marines. If i could come back and just see her, play with her baby sit while her mom goes out with someone who can only make her smile half as much as i do it would make joining the marines not seem so bad. My girls mom doesnt want me near her. I'm thinking of calling and applogizing or even gather the balls and showing up on her door step just to prove that in an act thts concevibly suicide i mean what I say when i'm say im more than just sorry.. I'm serious in my promise and conviction but words will only carry me so far