Life is wierd... thank God and the Goddess it is Friday!
Had a sighting yesterday... first one in a long time... we locked eyes while sitting across from each other at a stop light in town. I am so angry at myself because I have come SOOOO far and yet in an instant, I can be right back at the start and be a big puddly mess who ceases to function. (It took cars honking at me when the light long chaged to green to shake myself out of the daze.) But so proud at the same time because every day I am tougher and stronger than the day before. And in a wierd sick way, I am "thankful" everything happened, because I am that much stronger and I wouldn't be who I am without it all... don't know if that makes any sense... this song came on the ipod after and all was right in the world...
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Fighter
by Christina Aguilara
After all you put me through
You'd think I'd despise you
But in the end, I wanna thank you
'Cause you made me that much stronger
Well I, thought I knew you
Thinking, that you were true
I guess I, I couldn't trust
Called your bluff, time is up
'Cause I've had enough
You were, there by my side
Always, down for the ride
But your, joy ride just came down in flames
'Cause your greed sold me out in shame, mmhmm
After all of the stealing and cheating
You probably think that I hold resentment for you
But, uh uh, oh no, you're wrong
'Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do
I wouldn't know, just how capable
I am to pull through
So I wanna say thank you
'Cause it
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Ooh, yeah, ohh
Never, saw it coming
All of, your backstabbing
Just so, you could cash in
On a good thing before I'd realize your game
I heard, you're going round
Playing, the victim now
But don't, even begin
Feeling I'm the one to blame
'Cause you dug your own grave
After all of the fights and the lies
'Cause you're wanting to haunt me
But that won't work anymore
No more, uh uh, it's over
'Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture
I wouldn't know how, to be this way now
And never back down
So I wanna say thank you
'Cause it
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter
How could this man I thought I knew
Turn out to be unjust, so cruel
Could only see the good in you
Pretended not to see the truth
You tried to hide your lies
Disguise yourself
Through living in denial
But in the end you'll see
You, won't, stop, me
I am a fighter and I
(I'm a fighter)
I ain't gon' stop
(I ain't gon' stop)
There is no turning back
I've had enough, yeah...
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
(Oh, ooh yeah, ooh yeah)
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter
Thought I would forget (thought I)
I remember (ohh)
'Cause I remember (ohh)
I remember
Thought I would forget (ooh)
I remember (ohh)
'Cause I remember (ohh)
I remember
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter
