so time for a self loathing moment...
i hate posting really stupid stuff, but to me this stuff isn't stupid. i think i'm just really fed up with work, with friends, and with life in general at the moment.
like this weekend i was supposed to do stuff with a friend from high school on friday. i race home from work and change and then find out she doesn't want to go, meanwhile yes she did go out, but just didn't want to go out with me. well for whatever reason that was for, so be it. but she tells me to make sure i call her on saturday to go out. meanwhile i call her, she's like oh yeah we'll go out and then never fucking calls me. i called her yesterday while at work and she's like oh i fell asleep. sure you did. what the fuck? this is a normal occurence though, people are all like let's make plans and then nothing ever happens. bullshit, no wonder i hardly put effort out there to be a friend, i just get blown off.
then to add to it, the halloween store is kinda getting on my nerves. i love halloween but the staff there are a bunch of morons and really young high school kids and i just can't stand the high school drama going on there. it's tough to explain, but it just gets on your nerves hearing like freshmen in high school talking about how cool it is to drink... like "yeah man we're going to get so wasted on this can of pabst i found in my dad's fridge, way cool dude we'll be so drunk for our social studies class tomorrow!" ick. it's like get over it, it's alcohol.
and lastly, i guess my main problem is i have this craving to go out on a date. i've been trying to change my life around and it's just not working. i miss liking someone and getting all giddy when you meet them and just being taken out and cuddled and whatnot. not sure how to change that though, i haven't gone out on a date in like two years. sad really...
haha okay enough airing of my dirty laundry, i think i'm just having one of those "i suck" days. sorry all.
on a positive note though! notice i'm not gone! i have renewed my account so applause may follow.
i hate posting really stupid stuff, but to me this stuff isn't stupid. i think i'm just really fed up with work, with friends, and with life in general at the moment.
like this weekend i was supposed to do stuff with a friend from high school on friday. i race home from work and change and then find out she doesn't want to go, meanwhile yes she did go out, but just didn't want to go out with me. well for whatever reason that was for, so be it. but she tells me to make sure i call her on saturday to go out. meanwhile i call her, she's like oh yeah we'll go out and then never fucking calls me. i called her yesterday while at work and she's like oh i fell asleep. sure you did. what the fuck? this is a normal occurence though, people are all like let's make plans and then nothing ever happens. bullshit, no wonder i hardly put effort out there to be a friend, i just get blown off.
then to add to it, the halloween store is kinda getting on my nerves. i love halloween but the staff there are a bunch of morons and really young high school kids and i just can't stand the high school drama going on there. it's tough to explain, but it just gets on your nerves hearing like freshmen in high school talking about how cool it is to drink... like "yeah man we're going to get so wasted on this can of pabst i found in my dad's fridge, way cool dude we'll be so drunk for our social studies class tomorrow!" ick. it's like get over it, it's alcohol.
and lastly, i guess my main problem is i have this craving to go out on a date. i've been trying to change my life around and it's just not working. i miss liking someone and getting all giddy when you meet them and just being taken out and cuddled and whatnot. not sure how to change that though, i haven't gone out on a date in like two years. sad really...
haha okay enough airing of my dirty laundry, i think i'm just having one of those "i suck" days. sorry all.
on a positive note though! notice i'm not gone! i have renewed my account so applause may follow.

Your friend sounds really sketchy. Stop wasting your energy on her. It will just drain you. Save your energy for those who can love you back.
I know what you mean about being single. I was single for three years before meeting my boyfriend. I had the occasional sexual fling in there (a girl has needs), but it was weird getting used to being in a relationship. We're going on four months, and I'm still not used to it.