I think that the headache that is growing in my brain is getting perpetually larger! It is like I can not get past alot of things that are going on in my life and it is making my head spin out of control.
Last night: Andres called...
This you realize...is the beginning of the end...
He tells me that he was trying to get ahold of me monday to give me what i wanted...
what i wanted was some straight answers...he made it seem like he was going to tell me that he wanted to be with me...
I find this hard to believe...I think he just said that to make me feel worse about the situation!
We go out to dinner...I needed to straighten some financials out with him...and there it is! I get sucked right back in again! I see all the things that make me absolutley batty about him! The way i catch him staring at me out of the corner of my eye...the way he giggles like a school girl when he laughs....the way when he is laying on the couch one shoe hangs off his foot...almost a balancing act! I tell myself to let it go...but you know it is so hard...
At the end of the night I leave his house...gave him a hug and a kiss...said i was sorry and said goodbye..
I have to leave it at that...this is no longer healthy for me to long for someone who has no real interest in me or my feelings...so this is GOODBYE :hopefully:
I'm hopign that Jeff and I can do something together this weekend...I think I have developed what people call a CRUSH! It is still small in size...but every time we do something together it grows bigger and bigger...
On a brighter note...Toreena was added to SG today...you better go look at how beautiful she is! I love her set...how cute and she keeps her converse on the whole time...how sexy is that! You are such a sexy mama!
well back to work and popcorn...that's all i eat here anyways...hope you like the new pic! more to come soon i promise!
~muah
my weekend may kill me!
Last night: Andres called...
This you realize...is the beginning of the end...
He tells me that he was trying to get ahold of me monday to give me what i wanted...
what i wanted was some straight answers...he made it seem like he was going to tell me that he wanted to be with me...
I find this hard to believe...I think he just said that to make me feel worse about the situation!
We go out to dinner...I needed to straighten some financials out with him...and there it is! I get sucked right back in again! I see all the things that make me absolutley batty about him! The way i catch him staring at me out of the corner of my eye...the way he giggles like a school girl when he laughs....the way when he is laying on the couch one shoe hangs off his foot...almost a balancing act! I tell myself to let it go...but you know it is so hard...
At the end of the night I leave his house...gave him a hug and a kiss...said i was sorry and said goodbye..
I have to leave it at that...this is no longer healthy for me to long for someone who has no real interest in me or my feelings...so this is GOODBYE :hopefully:
I'm hopign that Jeff and I can do something together this weekend...I think I have developed what people call a CRUSH! It is still small in size...but every time we do something together it grows bigger and bigger...
On a brighter note...Toreena was added to SG today...you better go look at how beautiful she is! I love her set...how cute and she keeps her converse on the whole time...how sexy is that! You are such a sexy mama!
well back to work and popcorn...that's all i eat here anyways...hope you like the new pic! more to come soon i promise!
~muah
my weekend may kill me!
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p.s. as much as i am against shoes in the bed, i was also happy to see Toreena wearing those. that was probably my favorite photo set for the past month or two at least.