Monday Jan 06, 2003

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I changed the profile picture today to include a older photo I only recently printed. It's a shot of a girl I once knew. Taken one morning along the Mississippi River after one burnt out Mardis Gras night in New Orleans. She was excited by the new scarf she bought and decided to use it in the photo. Strange cause when I look at some of the pictures of her over time I realized I did many of shots with her face obscured..maskes ect. hidden meanings?? I avoided printing this one at the time(two years back) cause it reminded of a rough period in our relationship, but it now turns out to be an appropriate metaphor to the vailed distence we once shared...

spoke with her yesterday... she doesnt understand why I have no interest in being friends with her current boyfriend. What would possess her to think I would like to come over to there place to work on music with them? I'm all for resolution and cutting to the core, but I find this thought a bit over the top.
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djdarlek:
sadly Shpongle haven't done anything new since 'Tales of The Inexpressible'... but they must be spending their time doing something so i'd predict they'll release a new album at some point this year.. It amazes me how few ppl have even heard of them. I really love Dorset Perception.. and whenever i play it ppl are like "WOW! wtf is this! It's amazing!!!!!!!" but then again, some of these poor ppl think that anything latin sounding must be Ricky Martin.. what a sad world we live in.
superkitty:
Because this woman, deeply insecure down to the fiber of her being, is hoping to derive a sick pleasure from seeing you interact with her lame-ass, unworthy, will-never-hold-a-candle-to-you-in-any-way "man" of the moment because once this meeting has taken place, the stage is now set for her to imagine you racking your brains to understand how she could prefer this loser over you, thereby creating the inference in your mind that you are even more of a loser than him. Because that's how she really feels. Like a loser of the highest order. She wants to drag you down into those depths with her because a) then she won't feel so alone down there and b) you once cared deeply for her, therefore in her mind you must in fact be a loser too. You'll resist this entire scenario with all your might for your will is far stronger than this devil's engineer will ever be.

Oh, the games we play. The human race is an intelligent species but what it pours its mental energy into sometimes really makes you shake your head. My life is all about trying to dredge out those kinds of poisonous motivations from the deepest recesses of my brain and swab out those areas with Lysol. And it's one hell of a struggle, I'll tell you that.

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