optimistickid

i'm listening to Kid A now. great cd.

i wish i had some cool older friends. my friends suck. okay that's not true, but they aren't the friends i really want. i want some older friends that could be like mentors to me. you know... give me advice, be like an older brother to me. i want friends who have their own place and we're...
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so i changed my name from optimisticKid to wakeup. i was never optimistic at any time so i don't know why i thought of that dumb name. i chose wakeup because i just like the sound of it. and sometimes i feel like i am sleepwalking through life and i need to wake the fuck up

i had a bad day today. my neck is...
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I miss going to college. I miss the drive there. I miss picking what cd's I'll take for the ride. I miss sitting in class and learning. I miss taking notes. I miss meeting other students. I miss looking at all the nice looking girls on campus. I miss joking with friends in class. I miss waiting around in between classes. Reading in the library,...
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today i went to the mountain by myself and met a deer. he let me get within 5 feet of him and take some pictures whilst he was looking for leaves to chew on. it was really cool.

i am thinking about changing suicide girls name, optimisticKid, to something else. the problem is, i'm just not that optimistic. so you see the name doesn't fit...
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it's so sad. summer is ending. will i be glad when the leaves start to fall and the wind has a chill in it? oh yes i will. but i need to start enjoying the outdoors more whilst it is still pleasant to be outdoors. and plus my car has no heated seats. heated seats are indeed nice whenst the earth drifts far from the...
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poopoo smell make me wanna

this morning i went for a jog early. i felt really good after that was over. i always feel great after i run. you stop thinking for the most part and just feel your body. so it's a nice tired/relaxed mellow feeling that it gives me.

then i vacuumed the pool, which is a pain in the ass. and washed my car. it was very...
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i haven't updated my journal in a while. i don't think anyone reads it anyway. isn't it pathetic that i'm going to update it anyway? ha ha ha.... i want to grow my hair out. i want to have long beautiful hair just like i did when i was 17. yes, i want to be a beautyful 17 year old boy again.

Today was my last day at my job. And today my Mom got let go by her job too! That's so funny.... we're both going to be collecting unemployment. Plus now she will be around to bug me about getting a job. Which is a good thing, because I need all the motivation I can get.

Her being let go was actually a blessing in...
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Hung out by the pool today. My buddy Mike drove by and we ended up chillin by the pool, playing H-O-R-S-E, and stuff like that all day basically. I like lazy days, just doing nothing for the fun of it, wasting time.

Also I brought my guitar and amp out onto my deck today. Hadn't done that in years........ maybe because my amp weighs 150...
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I'm an ugly mother fucker. Took about 75 pictures of myself tonight for my profile pic and i think i looked good in 2. Well at least I can now date any girl who's so vain that they have to look better than their boyfriends.

Tomorrow night I am going to the Juliana Hatfield concert with my friend Jared and his girlfriend Kate. I haven't seen him in a long time because he lives in NYC, while I'm on the other side of the Hudson. Oh yeah and also he's always got plans on the weekends, and he works like a dawg. It's too bad, I miss hanging out with...
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