ontothenext

Today's Random Thoughts:

I had the strangest phone conversation of my life yesterday ... please explain...

Me: Hello?
Guy: How are you today?
Me: Fine, you?
Guy: Great Thanks
Me: Awesome
Guy: This is *i missed the name... talk talk talk... something about turning a bar near my school into a bed and breakfast
Me: Ok...
Guy: Is there anyone you don't like on campus?
Me: Uhh... what?
Guy: Is there anyone on campus that you don't like? You can say Guy or Girl, you don't have to say who it is.
Me: (Bored) Girl.
Guy: Ok if you could use anything on her to make yourself laugh what would it be?
Me: What are you talking about?
Guy: A rope, chain, or both?
Me: (Going along with whoever it is b/c its funny) A rope.
Guy: Ok, so she's tied up with the rope.. would you put her under your bed or in the bathroom?
Me: Uhh... I don't know (getting a little creeped out)
Guy: Where would you put her?
Me: Bathroom
Guy: Would you put her in the bathtub or with her face in the toilet?
Me: Umm...
Guy: What would make you laugh?
Me: toilet I guess...
Guy: Ok, which of your friends would be the first to see her?
Me: I have no idea
Guy: What would you do when her face is in the toilet?
Me: Listen, I really dont know. I dont usually put people's faces in toilets
Guy: *Laughs*
Me: Ok well it was nice talking to you...
Guy: Wait, what if your family won a years worth of free massages at a family reunion?
Me: That would be nice I guess
Guy: Yes, that sounds pretty good. How many family members would be there?
Me: I dont know.. 50-60?
Guy: Ok... do you have any male relatives from the age 17-19?
Me: I have to go
Guy: If they had to use a comedian as a sofa or chair, what would they pick?
Me: What?
Guy: Sofa or chair?
At that point I had to hang up. Hahah I live for this stuff.

Thanks for the testimonials! Bet your sweet asses that you will be geting one from me!!