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I'm usually fine with periods of being single but lately it's starting to wear on me. I miss waking up to someone I love and kissing them when they don't even know it. I miss putting off work because I'd rather think about a smile and a gaze. I miss smiling so hard that my face muscles cramp up and I feel weightless from the inside out.

I'm not even sure what kind of depressed I am....one moment I feel quiet and introspective. At other times I feel angry at myself for a multitude of reasons that don't even make sense. I've learned long ago that logic is no cure for depression. I'm not looking for a woman to save me but I feel like I've lost my inner voice.

In a way I envy my super obnoxious former-roommate that hit on women in the most obnoxious ways. I don't envy his technique or even respect it...the same goes for the number of women he'd be with but at least he was able to be more open with women when he'd talk to them. I have no problems talking to women but when I do asking them out seems about as plausable as asking them to donate a kidney so I don't even consider it. Maybe I'll snap out of it soon...sometimes I don't feel much like a "regular" guy.