obliviousfocus

So it is 4 am in the morning and i'm sitting here wide eyed and out of my mind. I've been thinking lately. Just thinking. About choices made and things lost. I remember an ex of mine. She had a lot of problems. I mean a lot of problems. She could never sleep right. Every night for a year I had to give her a full body massage and then rub her head. I would tell her bed time stories and eventually she would fall asleep. She would wake me up at 3 in the morning to get ice cream. And like an idiot I did it. I did all kinds of crazy things for this girl. Eventually things went sour and we parted ways. Now if someone asks me about my ex's and shit I tell them about it. I've heard everything from thats so sweet to damn I wish my boyfriend would do that for me. It has often made me wonder if I'm doing all these nice things why the hell am I alone. I've pondered this over and over and looked at the situations I've been in and I've come to a conclusion. This could be right, it could be wrong but it is the conclusion I have reached.

There are no nice guys only ugly assholes. J/K. I've found when you aren't as good looking as other guys you have to compensate and be much nicer than they would have to be to women. This is a blessing and a curse for some. Mull this over in your mind. If a guy isn't as good looking he has to use his whits and his charm to impress someone. This is fine. But if you are overly nice and sweet and just generally all around good person that fucks you. It sets you up like a porcelain doll of sorts. Women tend to keep guys like that as friends because they are afraid of losing that person out of a bad break up. So you get put into the arena of friends. This gives you the privleges of teasing and long great conversations but thats as far as you go. Many times you get to hear you'll make some one happy one day etc etc. You know eventually that statement drives you insane. Once again if you are so perfect why are you alone. Its a circle of sorts.

So what do I gather from my experiences. It is better off to be attractive so you can get the chance to be whatever. If you use your personality then the pay off is a way lower percentage rating. You can argue this with me all you want. This does sound like a juvenile arguement, but I still believe we never make it out of highschool.