oak

damn.

tonight was another night of blown opportunity. i mean, not completely blown, as i had a great night seeing the paybacks with dollface and tunnelslats but .... i messed it up a little when i had the opportunity to make it a little bit better and failed to take that opportunity. i mean, it wasn't anything huge ... best probable case scenario would not have like changed my life in any way, it just would have been a bit cooler of an experience altogether, and a bit cooler of a story to tell afterwards.

CarlottaDeville wrote me today and in her email she said something about not letting myself get in my own way. so true, so true. such a bad habit. bruce lee wrote about the same thing; he said that the awareness of one's self inhibits what one can accomplish. so i have to break that pattern, because that's the main thing holding me back.

ok so the cool part was, the paybacks were *fantastic*. jab told me to say hello to wendy for him, so i did. talked to her some after the show, too, along with the bassist, and they are just super cool people. absolute champions. i can't wait to see them again (this was my second time). they finished their encore thing, and me and another guy in the crowd were yelling for them to play "vegas" so they finally did, and what a great song to end it on. bad ass. if you haven't seen them play and get the opportunity, you really should do it.

alright, it's 4.30am and i've had it. gnite fuckers.