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Monday Aug 21, 2006

Aug 20, 2006
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My coworker brought a bird to work on Friday. I don't believe I should have to stay at work when I have to watch an animal shit on a coworker.

This afternoon, I grappled with the schism between my writing talent and my motivation to use it. I am talented; I must immodestly admit that. However, I have never had much desire to actually exercise talents that I know I have--once I know I can do something, actually doing it becomes more or less just manual labor. So I generate interesting idea after interesting idea, and I do nothing with them. I try intermittently, desultorily, but I never really follow through. In turn, this triggers the one bit of guilt that I carry: that I was gifted with so much mind and use it so sparingly.

In the end, I always decide that if we don't have enough problems, we as people will invent a few. Talent guilt seems to be my sole vice.

For now, I content myself to watch V for Vendetta and ponder whether Hugo Weaving's badassitude trumps that vaguely retarded look that Natalie Portman gets every time she tries to deliver a line. Not that I wouldn't mount her; I'd just do it from behind.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
charley:
At least you know you are talented at something. I have no idea where to direct my energies and I can't stand to do things half heartedly so that makes life kind of hard.

I would have stolen the bird, they make me happy.
Aug 22, 2006
scopitone:
I'm right in the same damn writing boat with you. Being forced to write anything often forces me to find five hundred million other things I've neurotically convinced myself need doing or my heart will explode out of my chest.

Time to hire a 24 hour dictation machine. That looks like a young Jessica Lange.
Aug 23, 2006

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