While I am waiting for my oatmeal I thought I would write a blog. Apparently not very well because I have already had like 50 misspellings 
anyway....Obviously not much has happened because I have been working on this awesome tugboat in maya! WOO getting paid for something I love doing! I am not sure if I am allowed to post pictures of it so I...
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anyway....Obviously not much has happened because I have been working on this awesome tugboat in maya! WOO getting paid for something I love doing! I am not sure if I am allowed to post pictures of it so I... Read More
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SO I have to write a quick post because I have a deadline! YES I said a deadline woo!!!! So my friend works for a big company and needed help modeling stuff (as in 3D modeling) and asked if I could help...of course I have nothing to do and am in need of money so I get $200 to model and texture a tugboat by...
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chefdaddy:
Stop looking at my shoes? Congrats it is always good to get paid for doing what you like doing. When you are down to eating icing you have to put it on something better than a spoon if you want to make it interesting.
lemmy_:
I love your sketches. And icing on a spoon is perhaps the best budget dessert of all time.
And hey, thanks for the sweet comment on my set! xoxox
And hey, thanks for the sweet comment on my set! xoxox
Life
So I pulled a muscle in my back the other day and it was KILLING ME yesterday so I gobbled advil and was couch ridden waiting for it to recover
I hate being helpless! I hate even more not being able to do anything (my boyfriend had to wait on me, which he was very sweet about!)
Anyway, while being couch ridden I decided...
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So I pulled a muscle in my back the other day and it was KILLING ME yesterday so I gobbled advil and was couch ridden waiting for it to recover
I hate being helpless! I hate even more not being able to do anything (my boyfriend had to wait on me, which he was very sweet about!)
Anyway, while being couch ridden I decided...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
sadista:
Damn, he's pretty hot as a guy. Club One on Jefferson has drag shows!
technaught:
Thanks 
It was such an awesome trip!! You guys should go next year!!!
Hope your back is better soon!!! That's never a fun thing...
It was such an awesome trip!! You guys should go next year!!!Hope your back is better soon!!! That's never a fun thing...
Job
I applied to 3 more places today. I think my brain is melting out of my ear because if those stupid questionnaires in the applications. There is only so many times you can ask me if I work well with others before I go in rage mode RAWR!!! Target turned me down (I'm not what they are looking for) and no other news from...
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I applied to 3 more places today. I think my brain is melting out of my ear because if those stupid questionnaires in the applications. There is only so many times you can ask me if I work well with others before I go in rage mode RAWR!!! Target turned me down (I'm not what they are looking for) and no other news from...
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VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
warriorwoman:
You are adorable and love thenails
lectorvyal:
i think if i recall correctly, i just landed on my ass and it hurt.
*sniff* I feel like I am going to cry (for joy) with all the wonderful comments and messages I got from my last blog. You guys and gals are the best! I am so glad I joined SG<3 I feel like I can be my crazy weird self here. 
lots of love to everyone! 
In other news...I got so anxious yesterday because of my financial...
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lots of love to everyone! In other news...I got so anxious yesterday because of my financial...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
portraitguytwo:
It sounds very trite to say "Hang on, and things will get better." They WILL, you know. I think your "art therapy" is a good idea, and drawing can be such a stress reliever! As for "DeliriousWisdom": I really like that name!
rhutunes:
Hey DeliriousWisdom!
For what it is worth, here are my thoughts. Ask every friend, family member... everyone you know for a small contribution to your education. Be specific. Tell them 'the why', 'the what' and most specifically 'the how' much it means to you. This is an opportunity for you and for them. As for the job search be surgical---ask with your whole heart---as if staying in school IS riding on it. "I would like to work here how can we make that happen" actually got me a job once. I was so pumped I actually said something that ridiculous.
This is my second attempt to add this comment as my internet connection broke and the last one didn't send after I'd finished it. Surprisingly I'm trying again. I don't know why. You don't know me. I don't know you. Oh yeah, I told you that you reminded me of 'Betty' once (the 'Archie' not the 'Page'). What do I know? Incidentally, you seem more like 'Mary Jane' to me in this moment. As for your boyfriend... he will help you. Two can live cheaper than one. There are a lot of ways to cut costs. Not pleasant perhaps but possible. I have survived half my life being a student, an artist and a working professional. The money woes---the debt---will eventually sort itself out but you look back at the WORK you did. That's what you remember when months become years become decades. In my case, it's the people, the shows and what you created... that's what I remember.
So, this my first and only blog comment on this site plus this my second attempt to post---here is what I really wanted to write... In your eyes I see great joy... I suspect it is probably in your physical presence and I don't doubt that it is a part of you that runs deep... you are an artist and what will always give you the greatest joy will be exploring that personal path... So don't leave it... for any reason... certainly not money... it will work itself out, it always does. Be bold and keep asking. Be creative and ask in ways that are new. Artist keep trying, and trying... trying with tears, with laughter. Press on. This is your opportunity to define for yourself what this means for you. It is a 'journey' for a reason. There is more than one path to doing what completes you. Being open is really the best way to save time. So be open. Ask in every way you can think of for a solution. I've spent years auditioning for jobs in every manner possible and I know it is never easy. But for me, personally... It has been worth it... "to sing, to laugh, to dream".
Finally, you have now this moment of my life... I am hoping it contains an energy... to support you as you follow your path as directly as your are able... do not give up... good luck, DeliriousWisdom
P.S. I feel that DW sounds too close to something you wash your ball bearings with
For what it is worth, here are my thoughts. Ask every friend, family member... everyone you know for a small contribution to your education. Be specific. Tell them 'the why', 'the what' and most specifically 'the how' much it means to you. This is an opportunity for you and for them. As for the job search be surgical---ask with your whole heart---as if staying in school IS riding on it. "I would like to work here how can we make that happen" actually got me a job once. I was so pumped I actually said something that ridiculous.
This is my second attempt to add this comment as my internet connection broke and the last one didn't send after I'd finished it. Surprisingly I'm trying again. I don't know why. You don't know me. I don't know you. Oh yeah, I told you that you reminded me of 'Betty' once (the 'Archie' not the 'Page'). What do I know? Incidentally, you seem more like 'Mary Jane' to me in this moment. As for your boyfriend... he will help you. Two can live cheaper than one. There are a lot of ways to cut costs. Not pleasant perhaps but possible. I have survived half my life being a student, an artist and a working professional. The money woes---the debt---will eventually sort itself out but you look back at the WORK you did. That's what you remember when months become years become decades. In my case, it's the people, the shows and what you created... that's what I remember.
So, this my first and only blog comment on this site plus this my second attempt to post---here is what I really wanted to write... In your eyes I see great joy... I suspect it is probably in your physical presence and I don't doubt that it is a part of you that runs deep... you are an artist and what will always give you the greatest joy will be exploring that personal path... So don't leave it... for any reason... certainly not money... it will work itself out, it always does. Be bold and keep asking. Be creative and ask in ways that are new. Artist keep trying, and trying... trying with tears, with laughter. Press on. This is your opportunity to define for yourself what this means for you. It is a 'journey' for a reason. There is more than one path to doing what completes you. Being open is really the best way to save time. So be open. Ask in every way you can think of for a solution. I've spent years auditioning for jobs in every manner possible and I know it is never easy. But for me, personally... It has been worth it... "to sing, to laugh, to dream".
Finally, you have now this moment of my life... I am hoping it contains an energy... to support you as you follow your path as directly as your are able... do not give up... good luck, DeliriousWisdom
P.S. I feel that DW sounds too close to something you wash your ball bearings with
Most of you probably don't know this but I am incredibly shy. I don't mind talking to people in a blog but for some reason I feel like messaging someone is very personal. Don't get me wrong I love getting messages because I feel like it is someone trying to get to know me more, but I (personally) have problems with messaging someone. I feel...
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kurosune:
AWWWW BABES!!!!!! *HUGS* YOU NEVER BOTHER ME!!!!! I absolutely love talking to you! Of course!!!!! ^_^ Tell you what! I'll bring you back something from Comic Con, mmkay? 
nikdante:
I can certainly empathise with the social anxiety. For some reason, even amongst friends, I find it really hard to stand up with a drink in my hand and talk to people. However, if sitting around a table, it's fine. I also hate phoning people and will do anything to avoid it - in that respect, messaging etc is ideal for me. Thanks for accepting my friend request - hope to get to know you better (but no messaging yet - let's not run before we can walk!)
NEW SETS?!?!?!?!
People want to photograph me I feel so special...I realize that I am not since that is pretty much what this site is about but I still feel special DAMN IT .
One is in Florida which I would love to take a little vacation and do a photoshoot but I am not sure I can afford to pay for gas or a...
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People want to photograph me
I feel so special...I realize that I am not since that is pretty much what this site is about but I still feel special DAMN IT .
One is in Florida which I would love to take a little vacation and do a photoshoot but I am not sure I can afford to pay for gas or a...
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zahariel:
Hey thanks for the friend request and heres a wave from a fellow nerd
marksy:
pretty darn tempting outfit - I'd say
Porphyria posted my picture in her blog! I am so excited. I have no idea why it excites me so much but it does. I really like her as a person because all the stuff she likes I seem to like as well...(octopi, anime, video games, etc.) She is going to Otakon (which I am so jealous about) I used to go to Otakon religiously... Read More
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dartano:
I love that you understand what constitutes true beauty - you are amazing. You should totally continue to cosplay, but do it on your own terms. Be who you want to be - be who you are.
kurosune:
ZOMG HOW DID I MISS THIS?!?!?! YOU MAKE A GREAT MARLUXIA!!!!! Yeeeee!!!!! I think you should TOTALLY cosplay Nana!!! Either one! Eeee! X3
okay so I realize that I probably over reacted with my last post...I get very steamed about certain issues and being plus sized is one of them. After talking extensively with my boyfriend and a couple other people on SG I feel much better and feel kind of silly for the way I acted...I still think PSW need more love but I will leave it...
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jailbait:
Awh! Thank you! That is so sweet, dear
kay:
Agreed. I would also like to see them change it up a bit. I know my latest set will never be purchased. You know though, I'm okay with that. I thought I would take it down, but I'm actually fairly proud of the job Lorelei did with me, and honestly if SG wanted to buy it, I would turn them down. A member recently pointed out something very fitting a few days ago. SG is beauty defined by people in the 20-25 crowd. My fan base is not that crowd, and I do not fit in that box of tattoo'd, pierced, cool hair colour grouping. That all being said, what a Suicide Girl is, is a girl who is herself. Free to express it, and free not to care what other people think. Not a waist size, or a I loved it count. *shrug* Some of my two cents.
The other thing to consider is the very bottom line. This is still a porn site. It is in business to make money. Member review is one of the worst things to happen, because now we have all these girls, either hopefuls or SG's, that submit these sets in the hopes of getting selected. If I were a business owner, why would I pay models for sets, when they willingly put them up at the speed of light? People are still signing up every day, and now, I not only have SG's having to hustle their photos, but a fuck ton of Hopefuls who do as well. Whether I agree with it or not, does not matter. I have no say. I am not the owner and I'm not a part of the team who decides which way the corporation is moving, but it still is a bottom line.
Do what you choose to do, and be proud of it. That is the only thing that really matters, and if it is not amusing to you, then it is not worth your time and frustrations.
The other thing to consider is the very bottom line. This is still a porn site. It is in business to make money. Member review is one of the worst things to happen, because now we have all these girls, either hopefuls or SG's, that submit these sets in the hopes of getting selected. If I were a business owner, why would I pay models for sets, when they willingly put them up at the speed of light? People are still signing up every day, and now, I not only have SG's having to hustle their photos, but a fuck ton of Hopefuls who do as well. Whether I agree with it or not, does not matter. I have no say. I am not the owner and I'm not a part of the team who decides which way the corporation is moving, but it still is a bottom line.
Do what you choose to do, and be proud of it. That is the only thing that really matters, and if it is not amusing to you, then it is not worth your time and frustrations.
When I originally came to SG I was excited to be a hopeful. I have been ridiculed all my life about my weight and I finally came to a spot where I felt happy being me. I shot a set and got bad reviews (I know the photography wasn't great) but I felt so awful I deleted the set. I regret doing that now but...
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chefdaddy:
I too am disappointed by the lack of front page psw however I will say this, every time this point is raised in any group the argument is made that it is at least partially an issue of numbers. That being that SG gets so many submissions and runs through so many sets in MR that the number of psw sets is dwarfed by the number of sets submitted by skinny chicks therefore the number of psw sets on the front page is somehow proportional to number submitted. While I do not personally subscribe to that theory I do love PSW sets and am in favor of a strategy in which there is a flood of psw sets that cannot be denied or ignored and they start getting on the front page. Your plan to with hold a set fucks up my plan. My plan" is a swiss fucking watch". Please reconsider.
jcourtney:
Three terrific sets. Please don't give up. There are many of us that love you and your sexy body.
I hope you land your dream job no matter where it is!